Zac
After more than a month together, everything wasn’t perfect, but life with Carrick was pretty good. Weird, but good. I still had to go to work with Taylor, but knowing that I was coming home to Carrick every night made things a lot better. We didn’t even have to do anything special; most nights were pretty boring, in fact. Carrick would attempt to teach me how to cook something, we’d smoke or play video games or paint, and then we would go to bed.
One night in particular, he had brought his laptop into bed. After checking Facebook and Twitter, he decided to look up some photos of me. I’m not really sure what possessed him to do it. I guess he just liked torturing me.
“Dude, you were so tiny,” Carrick said, snickering. “Like, pocket-sized.”
I frowned, suspecting that he wasn’t looking at brand new photos. A glance at his laptop screen showed that he was indeed looking at some promotional photos from Middle of Nowhere. With a groan, I said, “I was eleven. What do you expect?”
“I was taller than that when I was eleven…”
“You’re a freaking giant! Not a fair comparison.”
There wasn’t anything fair at all about Carrick’s little foray into my past. I wasn’t ashamed of it – well, most of it – but it still wasn’t fun to watch my boyfriend giggle over how tiny I was. I was terrified of what he would say or do next, but I couldn’t look away from his laptop. Somehow, he found his way to YouTube and landed on easily the most embarrassing video of all.
“No,” I managed to squeak out as the video loaded, revealing the three of us on a little stage in a mall, singing Boomerang.
“Oh… my… god…” Carrick said between laughs. “Oh yes.”
I could only growl in frustration with him, but he still wasn’t deterred. He was watching the video with intense concentration, a huge grin taking over his entire face.
“Aww, cute widdle Zaccy!”
Since he wasn’t going to stop, I figured I might as well join in. I leaned in a little closer and watched the video with him. “Shit, I wasn’t even trying to sing along.”
“Did you seriously try to pick up your little brother?” Carrick laughed. “He’s like half your size.”
“Have you seen him lately? Twice my size.”
“Yeah, well,” Carrick replied with a snort.
Luckily, the video wasn’t that long, and soon my nightmare was over. Or so I thought.
“Ooh, Summertime Blues. I love this song.”
“No!” I lunged for the laptop, trying to pry it out of Carrick’s grasp. I knew exactly what video he was talking about, and I did not want him to see it.
“Oh, come on,” Carrick said. “It can’t be that bad.”
“No, it’s worse,” I replied.
Carrick just smirked and yanked the laptop back. Obviously he wasn’t going to let me have my way. I didn’t feel like fighting over it, so I loosened my grip and let him take the laptop back.
He actually giggled when he pressed play. I could do nothing but sit back and brace myself – both for how awful the video was and for how much worse Carrick’s inevitable, gleeful reaction was going to be. It wasn’t a long video, and I only had to wait a few seconds for Carrick’s head bopping to stop. He cringed visibly, then looked at me and chuckled.
“Lemme guess… voice was changing?”
I nodded, narrowing my eyes at him. My voice had almost finished changing by the time we went back out on tour to promote our second album, but there were still a few really embarrassing moments. Luckily, most of them hadn’t been caught on video. Except that one.
“Aww,” Carrick said, smirking and pinching my cheek. “Such a cutie.”
I frowned and tried to back away from him, but there was only so far I could go while we were both tucked under the covers.
He snorted. “Aww, poor baby.”
“I’m not a baby,” I replied, my eyes narrowing more. “Wasn’t a baby then, either.”
“Course you are. You’re my baby, aren’t ya?”
I sighed and rolled my eyes. “Yeah, yeah… whatever.”
“Who’s my widdle baby? Who’s my widdle Zaccy?” Carrick asked, pinching my cheek again.
“Widdle?” I raised an eyebrow. He was really taking this making fun of me thing way too far, and I was running out of patience with him. It wasn’t nearly as funny as he thought it was.
“Yeah? And?” He just snickered.
I grabbed his hand and placed it on my dick. I wasn’t really hard, not yet, but I thought it still proved my point. “You sure about that?”
“Eh, can’t argue with that,” Carrick replied with a smirk, gripping my dick lightly. “At least you grew in one direction.”
“You’re really in no position to judge my manliness,” I said, snarling. I had intended to make some comment on the fucking pink boxers he was wearing, but the joke got lost somewhere in the anger I felt bubbling up inside me.
“Oh yeah?” Carrick raised an eyebrow. “So I didn’t totally have you bent over the kitchen table this morning? And the coffee table last night? And the bathroom sink yesterday afternoon?”
I growled. My anger won out over my embarrassment at talking about sexual stuff, and I replied, “And my cock wasn’t down your throat every single time, too?”
“Sure was,” Carrick said, patting my head. “Such a good boy.”
I growled again and shoved his hand away. He was really tempting fate.
“Ooh, someone’s feisty today… don’t make me teach you a lesson.” He punctuated that with a wink, and my anger only flared more.
“You’re not fucking funny, you know.”
“Really?” Carrick raised an eyebrow. “I think I’m hilarious.”
“I think you’re a little bitch.”
Carrick’s eyes widened. I loved finding ways to surprise him; if I hadn’t been so angry, I definitely would have celebrated that little win. After a moment spent staring wide-eyed at me, he grabbed a fistful of my hair and smirked. “You wanna run that by me again, kid?”
“I said… you’re. A. Little. Bitch.”
His fist tightened in my hair, yanking me toward him and crushing our lips together. I wasn’t entirely sure why my anger had apparently turned him on, but I wasn’t going to argue with it, either. I ran my fingernails down Carrick’s back, biting down on his bottom lip. The way his back arched told me that he liked that, too.
I didn’t really understand it, but it was turning me on, too. I pulled back to catch my breath, and Carrick didn’t miss the chance to make yet another snarky comment.
“You don’t think I’m so little when I’m ramming into your ass, do ya?”
I stared right into his eyes. “You’re alright.”
Carrick’s eyes narrowed and his grip on my hair tightened. With a low growl, he replied, “Oh, I’m more than alright, babe, and you know it.”
“You need to stop talking,” I replied.
I quickly decided that I wasn’t going to give him a chance to disobey that order. I yanked my boxers down with one hand, and shoved Carrick’s face into my lap with the other. It was a pretty well coordinated move; I was pleased both with myself for pulling it off and Carrick for letting me. His only reply was to moan around my dick as it filled his mouth.
“How’s that for little, huh?”
He glanced up at me and smirked, giving me a little shrug. That wouldn’t do. I growled at him and held his head down, thrusting my hips up and fucking his mouth. Carrick groaned, but let me get away with that, too, only dragging his teeth lightly in what I supposed was a tiny act of rebellion. I yanked his hair as a warning, and he only bit down harder.
I pulled him off my dick and growled, not really trusting myself to use words. This was all so new to me, and I was still angry, but I liked that he was letting me take that anger out on him this way. Even if I wasn’t totally sure what I was doing.
Carrick smirked and licked his lips. “Not bad.”
“Yeah, I’ll show you ‘not bad,’” I replied.
“Oh yeah? What’re you gonna do, pup?”
By that point, I couldn’t even tell where my anger ended and my lust began. They were pretty much one and the same. The fact that Carrick was clearly enjoying pushing me around only fueled the fire for both emotions. With a growl, I said, “On your knees, Carrick.”
“Make. Me.” He smirked defiantly.
Well, that was just silly. He wasn’t weak by any means, but we both knew I was stronger. I lifted him up like a ragdoll and forced him into the position I wanted him in. I yanked his boxers down and pressed my body against his back, enjoying the way this new position felt and giving myself a moment to catch my breath.
“Fuck…” Carrick gasped out. I knew he didn’t bottom very often, but he seemed to be enjoying this role reversal as much as I was.
“Now suck,” I said, pressing two fingers to his lips.
Even if I hadn’t done this with Carrick before, or been really dominant with anyone, I still had the general idea of what to do. Slightly to my surprise, Carrick complied, sucking my fingers into his mouth. A wave of pleasure flowed through my body – he was damn good with his tongue – but that ended the second he let his teeth scrape over my fingers. Normally, I wouldn’t have minded, but I was supposed to be the one in control this time.
“No. Biting.” I punctuated the statement with a growl and a tug on his hair. Carrick growled, but pulled his teeth back. I patted his head. “Good boy.”
That only caused him to bite down again, and I smacked his ass in return. This wasn’t so hard; I could totally dominate someone. Maybe not Carrick, since he really was such a little bitch, but the problem was him, not my wimpiness. At the smack, he groaned and bit down harder. With a growl, I pulled my fingers out of his mouth.
“Alright, if you’re gonna make this difficult,” I said.
“Ooh, I’m so fucking scared…”
I growled again, and slid both my fingers between his cheeks. “You probably should be…”
Carrick was shaking beneath me, and it made me tremble a bit, too. I knew I was probably going to hurt him, but he had all but asked for it. I didn’t give him long to wonder what my next move would be. In one smooth motion, I shoved both fingers into him.
“FUCK!”
“God, you’re tight,” I replied with a chuckle.
Carrick turned his head and snarled at me. It wasn’t a look that really said stop. So I wasn’t going to. I gave him a smirk and pulled my fingers almost all the way out, then thrust them back in even harder.
His back arched. “Fuck… motherfucker…”
I slowly began thrusting my fingers; after all, I didn’t want to really hurt him. Only kind of. Apparently, that wasn’t good enough for Carrick.
“That all you got?” He asked through gritted teeth.
I raised an eyebrow, and increased my pace. “Sure you can take it? You’re awfully tight…”
“I can take anything you can dish out, sweetheart,” he replied through a moan.
“We’ll see about that,” I growled. I pulled back just enough to slip a third finger in. It wasn’t easy; Carrick really was tight. That wasn’t exactly a surprise, though, but it was, well… really hot. It was a surprisingly big turn on to realize that he was letting me do something to him that few other guys had.
“Fuck!” Carrick gasped out. “You fucker… come on…”
I stared at him in disbelief for a second. He was still asking for more? Well, if that’s what he wanted, who was I to argue? I thrust my fingers harder, taking a sadistic sort of pleasure in the way it made Carrick scream. I gave my fingers a little twist, hoping to pull another scream from him.
“FUCK!”
“I’m sorry, didn’t quite catch that,” I replied, twisting my fingers again.
Carrick glanced over his shoulder at me, his face painted with rage. It didn’t even give me a second’s pause, though. I was too turned on, too caught up in how good it felt to dominate him to even be scared. With a loud growl, he asked, “You gonna fuck me or what?”
“Thought you’d never ask.”
I pulled my fingers out quickly and lined myself up. In one quick, hard thrust, I was in him. Carrick screamed out, and I didn’t even stop to make sure he was okay. If he wasn’t, I was sure he would tell me. I grasped his hips and pulled him back against me, thrusting into him hard at the same time.
“More,” Carrick moaned, locking eyes with me.
Again, who was I to deny him? I shoved his face down into the mattress and drilled into him even harder. Unless and until he complained, I was going to pour every ounce of my strength into it. Beneath me, Carrick clawed at the sheets.
“Fuck yeah. Harder.”
I had to close my eyes to keep focused and not lose my cool. With one hand, I held his face down, and with the other, I grasped his hip, my fingernails digging into his skin. Once I found the perfect rhythm, hard and fast, I opened my eyes again and saw Carrick stroking himself desperately.
“Fuck yeah, Zac…”
“Not so little now, am I?” I asked, punctuating each word with a thrust.
“Not bad,” he replied breathlessly, his tone of voice betraying him just a little bit.
The only reply I gave him was a snarl. I pounded into him even harder, raking my nails down his back. It was rare for Carrick to be quiet during sex, and while I was learning to enjoy the dirty talk, in that moment, I loved the silence. It seemed to heighten every sensation. Carrick must have felt the same way. His back arched so that he was almost kneeling straight up. I wrapped my arm around his waist, pulling him flush against my body and biting down on his neck.
“Fuck!” He reached a hand back to grip my hair. So much for him being quiet.
I moaned, and that prompted him to yank on my hair. It didn’t matter that I liked that; this wasn’t about him causing me a little pain, not this time. With a growl, I pulled his hand out of my hair.
He turned his head and smirked. “Thought you liked it when I petted you?”
“Shut. Up.”
“Make. Me.”
I thrust harder, drawing more loud moans from Carrick. But technically, that was still a sound. He hadn’t shut up like I told him. Gripping his hair tightly, I shoved his face against the mattress and held him there. He growling, but didn’t fight back, instead just wrapping his hand around his dick and stroking quickly. The sight of him like that was… fucking hot, actually.
“Fuck… Carrick…” I growled.
“That’s… the idea…”
Of course he couldn’t stay quiet for long, but I was too far gone to care. I sped up my thrusts again, losing myself in the way he felt. I would never get tired of the way it felt to get fucked by Carrick, but I had a feeling I could get used to this, too.
“Fuck, babe… close…” he gasped out.
I let out a low growl. “Yeah?”
Carrick nodded. “Fuck yeah.”
“Gonna come for me?” I asked. For once, I didn’t even feel myself blushing at the sound of something that dirty leaving my mouth.
“Fuck yeah I’ll come for you,” Carrick replied. He stroked himself faster, moaning loudly, and the site and sound of it pushed me closer to the edge.
“Shit…” I moaned. “I’m gonna fill you up.”
“Yeah, you fucking better.”
I grasped Carrick’s hips and pulled him back against me. My motions were so rough that I was almost hurting myself; Carrick had to be in pain, but maybe he liked it. I hoped he did.
“Fuck, Zac! Yeah!” His normal eloquence was completely gone, and he thrust back against me shamelessly. I moaned in reply and he added, “Come on, Zac. Give it to me.”
I couldn’t take it. I wanted it to last forever, but I knew it was only going to last a few more seconds. I dug my fingernails into Carrick’s hips and held him against me, giving a few last painfully hard thrusts. My entire body was shaking by the last thrust, all sense of rhythm or control gone as I shot my load into him.
“Fuck…” Carrick gasped out.
I let out a moan, still holding Carrick against my body. “Yeah…”
Seconds later, Carrick let out a loud growl, calling out my name as his orgasm hit him. I watched him explode into his hand, then finally pulled out of him and collapsed onto the bed. Carrick collapsed next to me and patted my thigh.
“Atta boy, Zac. Knew you had it in you.”
I blinked, taking in the smirk on his face. “I… what…”
“You think I don’t know exactly what buttons to push, babe?” Carrick grinned.
“You.. you mean…” I stuttered out, the meaning of his words slowly sinking in. “You. Bastard.”
“Yeah, yeah…” He just nodded and stretched, looking absolutely smug. I didn’t know whether to punch him or kiss him. With a wink, he added, “You love me.”
I rolled my eyes. “And I was about to apologize for hurting you…”
“Oh, babe,” Carrick replied, laughing. “Trust me. You didn’t even come close.”
“Guess I’ll have to try harder next time…”
He smirked. “You saying there’s gonna be a next time?”
“I… I think there could be,” I replied. I could feel myself blushing; my usual shyness about sex had only left me temporarily, it seemed.
Carrick just grinned again and ruffled my hair.
“That was… different,” I said. I could think of a million different ways to describe it, but none of them really did it justice.
“Yeah? Good different?”
I nodded. “Yeah. I think so.”
Wordlessly, Carrick wrapped an arm around me. He still looked so self-satisfied that I wanted to punch him, but I couldn’t really be mad at him.
“You know, I would have fucked you without you having to make me angry first…”
Carrick laughed. “But where’s the fun in that?”
“You really are horrible,” I replied.
He smirked, and placed a soft kiss to my temple. “You wouldn’t have me any other way and you know it.”
“Yeah, I guess,” I admitted with a chuckle.
He placed another kiss to my cheek. “You guess?”
“I’m just a little… confused,” I admitted.
“About what?” He asked, pulling back.
“You made me angry on purpose so I would… do that?”
“I didn’t mean to make you angry. I just wanted to push you a bit,” he said, his lips falling into the slightest of pouts. “I’m sorry, Zac. I won’t do it again.”
“I didn’t…” I began, losing my train of thought in his eyes and the way he touched my cheek. “I mean, I’m not saying I don’t wanna do that again…”
“Zac… you can talk to me, you know. It’s okay to be honest.”
“I know.” I nodded. “I’ve never really… like, taken control like that before.”
Carrick nodded. That wasn’t new information for him, I knew. I had told him a lot about how Taylor and I were together – more than I should have, probably, considering how perverted he was. The conversation nearly always devolved into jokes that weren’t really jokes about threesomes. But Carrick knew I wasn’t really that kinky… at least, I didn’t think I was. I was starting to reconsider that, though.
“Didn’t really know I wanted to…” I admitted.
Carrick smirked. “Yeah, I had a feeling you’d never actually try it unless I pushed.”
“You’re lucky I fucked you instead of punching you,” I replied with a smirk of my own. “Could have gone either way.”
“A risk I was willing to take.”
“How did you know that I would… enjoy it?”
Carrick’s smirk turned into one of his rare sincere smiles. “If you didn’t, I would have stopped you.”
“Yeah?” I didn’t really doubt him, but I just wanted him to keep being sincere and kind of sweet.
He nodded and stroked my cheek. His voice soft, he said, “I would never do anything to hurt you. You know that, right?”
“Of course I know that…” I replied. It was funny; I had been worried about hurting him, at least physically. But there he was talking about hurting me. I understood what he meant, though.
“Are you happy, Zac? With me, I mean.”
“Yeah, I am,” I replied with a nod. And I was, but the strange, low tone my voice took on made it sound like I doubted myself far more than I really did.
“I hope so,” Carrick said, stroking my hair. “All I want is for you to be happy. No matter what it takes.”
I sighed. This was getting a lot deeper and more emotional that I really felt up to handling after sex like that. “I know, Carrick.”
“I’m really glad to be here,” he said, smiling. “It means a lot to me that you actually want to be with me.”
“I do wanna be with you,” I replied, trying to smile and wishing I sounded more sure of myself.
Carrick returned my smile, but sighed. “I know… and I know how hard it is for you to admit that.”
I nodded and glanced away. As always, he could see right through me.
“Hey,” Carrick said, gently turning my face so that I was looking at him again. “I know you still love him. I would never ask you to ignore those feelings. And you call the shots here.”
“Yeah…” I replied softly, nodding.
“If you ever decide you can’t do this, I want you to know that I’ll still be here.” He gave me a quick kiss. “No hard feelings.”
He smirked a little at that, and I rolled my eyes. “Everything’s an innuendo with you, isn’t it?”
“Actually, I was being sincere,” he replied with an eye roll of his own.
“Yeah, I know,” I replied, giving him a little smirk. “Which is weird, but I kinda like it. And… I really appreciate that. What you said about still being here.”
Carrick gave me that sincere smile again. “I care about you way too much to want to leave. You know me… friends, boyfriends, lovers – it’s all good. I’m just happy to have you in my life.”
“I’m glad I have you, too,” I replied. And for once, I sounded like I meant it.