Greedy
Have you ever heard yourself say something, but it’s so absolutely ridiculous and out of character that you have to stop and replay it in your mind just to be sure you were really the one who said it?
As Carrick stares at me, his eyes wide, all I can hear are the words Carrick. Stay. repeating over and over in my mind.
I said it. I really said it. And he hasn’t left yet.
Even Taylor is suspended in motion, his hand not moving at all as he too waits to see what Carrick is going to do. After what seems like forever, Carrick gives me the tiniest of nods and pushes the door back together behind him. He’s going to stay.
As one, Taylor and I scoot over to allow Carrick room to climb onto the bed with us. The second he’s within reach, I’ve got a hand on his shirt, willing it to just disappear. He takes the hint and begins to lift it over his head. That seems to set things back into motion; Taylor leans down and places a tantalizing kiss to my hip before putting his fingers back to work. When we were paused, I could almost convince myself this wasn’t really happening, that hadn’t really made such a ridiculous demand of Carrick. But I did, and it really wasn’t all that out of character for me, was it?
Of course I’d want both of them if given the choice. I’m just that greedy.
Now that I have them, I’m not even sure what to do with them. Taylor seems to be holding up his end of things pretty well, though. It’s surprising that I can even form a coherent thought with his fingers inside of me, stretching me, pushing my boundaries by the second. I want more – more of anything – but I don’t know how to ask for it. Instead, I settle for something simple. Something I don’t think I have to ask for. I grasp Carrick’s shoulders and pull him toward me until our lips meet. It’s a surprisingly gentle kiss, given everything else that’s happening right now, but I like the contrast. I like the way he cups my face in his hands and the way his stubble just barely tickles my face.
It still isn’t enough, though. I still want more. My hands scramble to try to free Carrick from the rest of his clothes and somehow he gets the hint and manages to remove his pants and underwear without disrupting everything else that’s going on. Taylor can’t have too much attention diverted from himself, I suppose, so his mouth is on me again, working in tandem with his fingers to make me see stars.
I trail my hand down Carrick’s chest, but the moment I make contact with his dick is the moment that Taylor stops everything he’s doing to me. The sudden loss of sensation is almost more intense than the sensation itself and it leaves me gasping for air as I glance back at Taylor for some understanding of what he thinks he’s doing.
He doesn’t meet my eyes, though. His are focused on Carrick and completely unreadable anyway. He glances around the room, then back at Carrick, and asks, “Lube?”
Despite the fact that I’m still panting, I actually feel a lot calmer about the direction this is going now that Carrick is here by my side. It should feel strange to let him see me like this, spread out on the bed and absolutely shameless, with someone other than him. It doesn’t, though. I need him here, I think, to help me through this first time with Taylor. I can analyze just exactly what that means and how fucked up it makes me later. Right now, I just want to feel.
Carrick motions to the bedside table, but doesn’t say a word. Taylor leans over him to reach into the drawer and Carrick draws closer to me. I can’t help thinking it’s both because he wants to be farther away from Taylor and because he wants to be closer to me. Or because he knows I need him closer. Whatever it is, I like it. I melt into him comfortably as he adjusts our positions so that he’s halfway underneath me, practically holding me up. As I settle in, I can feel his dick pressing against my back, and I wish I could help relieve some of that pressure for him, but this position is too perfect to move. He presses a gentle kiss to the back of my neck as Taylor finally finds what he’s looking for and returns to his position between my legs.
Even as Carrick continues to sprinkle kisses on my neck, my attention is completely focused on Taylor. He dribbles the lube directly onto his cock, moaning loudly when the first drops make contact with his flesh. He takes his time smoothing it all over, making sure that he’s coating from base to tip, and my eyes follow every tiny little movement of his hand. Everything, from Carrick’s gentle kisses to Taylor’s strokes, seems to be in slow motion right now and I’m enjoying that temporary reprieve as much as I can. It’s a type of torture, too, but at least it gives me a chance to breathe before I’m pulled under again.
And then it’s over.
Taylor scoots in closer to me, nudging my legs farther apart. They stay tangled with Carrick’s even as I comply and let him nudge my knees upward so that I’m bared completely to him. I can feel my cheeks flushing again, but Taylor doesn’t seem to notice. His eyes flash to mine for a second before they turn back to his destination. He gives himself one last, slow stroke before closing the distance between our bodies.
When he pushes into me, I swear he’s set fire to my body. I’m burning up from the inside out, being completely consumed by Taylor. For a moment, there’s nothing but heat and pressure. All of my senses seem to have gone out of focus at the same time. The only thing that brings me back is Carrick gently stroking my hair, whispering something in my ear that might not even be made up of actual words. Slowly but surely, I return to earth, and while the feeling of Taylor inside of me is still intense, it isn’t dominating my senses so completely anymore.
I was right. I knew I needed Carrick to get me through this.
As drunk and driven by lust as he is, Taylor still manages to give me a moment to adjust before he really begins. When that moment is up, though, he builds up a tortorous pace. I can barely breathe at all with the way he’s thrusting into me. Every gasp of air I do manage to let out only seems to be caught by him, giving him more and more energy to keep going. I swear each thrust is just bringing me closer and closer to death.
But Carrick’s here. He’s holding both of my hands and still whispering in my ear, telling me it’s alright. I believe him. I don’t trust the dark look in Taylor’s eyes, but I believe Carrick.
I want to say something to him, but I’m pretty sure a “thank you” in the middle of him watching my brother fuck me would be really strange anyway. But he needs to know how much I love having him here. The best I can do is turn my head to the side and kiss his cheek. He takes the hint and turns so that our lips are pressed together. It’s not much of a kiss, but I’m too breathless to manage much more.
A hand touches my cheek and it takes me a moment to realize it’s Taylor, not Carrick. He’s not pulling me away from him, but I can tell from the way his hand just rests against my flesh that that’s what he wants. Reluctantly, I pull away and turn back to face Taylor. I can’t help wondering if he’s jealous, but if he is, I don’t see it on his face at all. Still, I can’t help think that he’s trying to mark his territory when he leans down and kisses me so much less gently than Carrick did.
His lips still taste like beer, but I don’t mind. There’s a voice in the back of my mind trying to complain about how drunk Taylor is, but it’s quickly silenced by how good this all feels. I let go of Carrick’s hands so I can reach out and touch Taylor, running my hands up and down his back as we kiss.
All too soon, the kiss ends. In the silence that follows, with Taylor staring back and forth between me and Carrick, I expect him to say something, anything. What I don’t expect him to do is kiss Carrick.
Carrick lets out a little surprised yelp as Taylor grabs his hair and pulls his face forward until their lips collide. He’s just as forceful with Carrick as he was with me. Maybe even moreso. And I’m just caught in the middle, watching it happen so closely that I can see the exact moment when Taylor slips his tongue into Carrick’s mouth. I have no clue what Tay is trying to prove now. I’m not sure he even knows. Maybe he’s just fucking with me – with us – now, just testing his boundaries to see what he can get away with.
I can’t even look at either of them once the kiss ends. I shut my eyes tightly and just focus on physical sensation. I don’t need to think about emotions right now. I just need to feel. So, naturally, this is the moment when Taylor finally decides to speak.
“Turn around.”
I blink and see that he’s looking at me. Not that I really thought he was talking to Carrick, but I had to check. He gives me a look as if to ask what I’m waiting for. Carrick scoots to the side to give me room and Taylor pulls out of me, so I know I can’t really debate whether or not I’m going to follow his order. I am. Was there really ever any doubt? I don’t think I have any shame left at this point, so I do as Taylor said and turn around, on my hands and knees facing the headboard. I can see Carrick more easily now, leaning awkwardly against the headboard, but I don’t want to look at him. Maybe I do have a little bit of shame left.
Taylor doesn’t warn me at all before sliding back into me. It doesn’t really hurt anymore, but it still takes me by surprise and leaves me gasping and holding onto the sheets. It’s not enough, though. This position lets Taylor thrust even more ruthlessly, if that’s even possible. My vision blurs again, stars exploding behind my eyes every time he slams into me.
He slows only a little as he leans over me and stage whispers in my ear, “Suck his cock.”
This has got to be some sick sort of game to Taylor; I’m certain of it now. But what can I do? I’m more powerless to refuse him than ever before. His voice was loud enough for Carrick to hear and I can tell that he’s breathing harder now. He wants it, of course, despite whatever awful thoughts I’m sure he’s having about Taylor right now. He scoots over so that he’s sitting right in front of my face, and I don’t bother to say a word to Taylor or even glance back at him. I risk one quick look up at Carrick and I can’t read the expression on his face at all.
I take Carrick’s dick into my mouth all at once because I figure I might as well show off a little. I’m not sure what I’m trying to prove to Taylor, but I know I’m trying to prove something and so is he. He fucks me harder and harder as I suck Carrick, and I can’t help matching my pace to his so that soon enough, we’re all moaning in some sick and twisted form of three part harmony.
It seems fitting that I’m quite literally stuck between the two of them now.
Taylor tugs at my hair, and I think that’s supposed to be some sort of signal that he’s getting close. His other hand creeps around to finally grasp my cock, even though I’m fairly certain I could have come anyway. The added sensation, his hand stroking me quickly, only pushes me even closer until I can’t even focus on one single sensation at all.
I come first, shooting all over Taylor’s hand. He shoves his hand into Carrick’s face and I strain to look up and see his reaction. For a moment, I think Carrick is going to deny him, but then he takes hold of Taylor’s wrist and laps up every drop of my come that’s covering his fingers. He’s still lapping at Taylor’s fingers when I feel him come, his hips bucking up as he does. If I wanted to pull away – I didn’t – Carrick didn’t give me a chance at all, and I swallow every drop he has to offer.
At no point does Taylor cease his thrusts. If anything, he only speeds up after Carrick and I come. He’s absolutely relentless, his hand still gripping my hair as he pounds into me. I’ve pretty much lost the will to do anything but lay my head on Carrick’s thigh and try to remember how to breathe. I can’t even muster up any sort of reaction when I feel come inside of me, still gripping my hair and filling me with this strange warmth.
He thrusts a few more times, softly now, before pulling out. He barely has to nudge my shoulder at all to roll me over and then lift me like a bag of bones. He presses a quick but forceful kiss to my lips and then he’s up, dressing himself like nothing strange at all has happened here.
Mere seconds later he’s out the door, and it feels like he might as well have not even been here at all.
I collapse back onto the mattress and Carrick fumbles around in the floor for a moment before handing me some old t-shirt to clean myself up with. I barely even have the energy to try, but I do the best I can. My shame finally returns to me, a deep blush creeping across my cheeks as I try to make myself less of a sticky mess. Carrick isn’t looking, though. His back is turned to me as he pulls on a pair of boxer briefs. I can’t decide if I want to see his face or not.
When he climbs back onto the bed, I don’t meet his eyes at all, instead choosing to focus on a point just over his shoulder. He hands my boxers to me and I pull them on without looking at him at all. I don’t have the energy to bother with any more clothes than that, so I just roll onto my stomach and shove my face into the pillow.
“Hey,” Carrick says softly, running a hand through my hair.
“What?”
“It’s alright,” he says. “It’s gonna be alright.”
I don’t know what he’s referring to, but I’m pretty sure that right now, it’s anything but alright. How can anything ever be right or normal again after that? That wasn’t how this was supposed to happen. My first time with Taylor wasn’t supposed to be like that.
A part of me wants to run after Taylor and scream at him for ruining everything, but right now, curling up next to Carrick and just falling asleep sounds even more appealing. So that’s exactly what I do.