The One With Fuzzy Balls
I would never have admitted it to Zac, but I was nervous about Thanksgiving. Although I assured him that his parents would be fine with our relationship, I didn’t really believe my own words. In the end, they surprised even me with their open-mindedness. My parents were equally blase about the changing status of our relationship, much more concerned with Black Friday shopping plans than my love life.
Our visit to Tulsa passed by quickly–far more quickly than either one of us expected, I think–and then we were back in Los Angeles. The change in weather was so extreme that it almost felt wrong to go back to work in a light jacket and scarf instead of the layers upon layers necessary to survive an Oklahoma blizzard.
Despite the warm California weather, Ruby had Christmas spirit to spare. While we were gone, she had strung lights and garland all around the club and even put up a tree in one corner. She’d called us all in to work early one day to start practicing a holiday routine. When we arrived, Santa Baby was already pumping through the club’s speakers, and a box of hats and bells sat on the edge of the stage.
Before either of us could say a word, Ruby sent two Santa hats flying through the air toward us. Zac caught both and planted one of them on my head, grinning evilly.
“I don’t know what you’re smiling about,” I said, flicking the fuzzy ball out of my face. “You have to wear one, too.”
“Just wait until you see the whole costume!” Ruby squealed. That was, apparently, Cade and Eduardo’s cue. They appeared through the slit in the curtain, clad in big black boots and red velvet briefs with white fur trim.
“Santa Claus man panties,” Zac said, a note of disbelief in his voice. “More like ‘no, no, no.’”
“There are furry robes and bells, too,” Ruby said, obviously missing–or more likely ignoring–Zac’s disapproval. “Yours are on your chairs, so go get changed and we can run through the routine.”
Zac excused himself to the bathroom first, while I went on into the ready room to don my gay apparel, as it were. Cade and Eduardo, still joined at the hip, appeared just as I was tugging the skintight briefs up my legs.
“Well, Santa gave somebody a big package,” Cade remarked, plopping down on the edge of the table in front of me. “Whoever gets to unwrap that is one very lucky guy.”
“Ho, ho, ho,” I replied as cheerfully as I could manage, sitting down to put on my boots.
Cade smirked. “Oh, I bet you are.”
“I’m sure he’s on the naughty list,” Eduardo remarked, twirling around something that looked a lot like mistletoe. “Especially after the loverboys went away for the weekend. I bet somebody got his stocking stuffed…”
I laughed awkwardly at that. The truth was, Zac and I hadn’t had sex yet. We kissed and cuddled, but sexually we seemed to be stuck at the dry humping stage, with only a couple quick hand jobs to speak of otherwise. I had thought it was best to let him take the lead, but I was realizing that he didn’t even know the steps to this particular dance.
I couldn’t tell Cade and Eduardo that, though, for so, so many reasons. Attempting to play coy, I smirked and said, “Now, you know I don’t kiss and tell.”
Cade rolled his eyes. “We see your junk every night, Taylor. There’s no need to be shy. It’s not like we’re asking for details.”
“Speak for yourself,” Eduardo said.
“If we made a sex tape, you would break into our apartment and steal it, wouldn’t you?”
“Have you made a sex tape?” He asked. “Don’t tease me with things like that. It isn’t nice.”
“Even if we had, that type of reaction is exactly why I wouldn’t tell you,” I replied.
“Why you wouldn’t tell him what?” Zac asked, walking into the room. “How bad he looks as Padre Christmas?”
Eduardo raised an eyebrow. “You’re just jealous of how good I look.”
“That’s exactly the problem,” Zac replied, completely deadpan. “My brain can’t even fathom your level of sexiness.”
Eduardo’s response to that was to dangle his artificial mistletoe in Zac’s face. Zac yelped and jumped backward.
“Not cool, dude!” Zac shouted, backing away from Eduardo, who continued to chase after him. “Just because I’m with Taylor doesn’t mean I’m going to kiss anyone with a dick. Sorry.”
“I think that means you’re special,” Cade practically cooed, patting me on the back.
I felt like the Chesire cat again, my smile so wide it practically hurt. We’d come a long way now, and Zac’s ability to so casually admit that he was with me was proof of just how far. Between that and all the holiday cheer happening, my heart felt like it had grown three sizes.
Trying to fight back the grin, I grabbed Zac and pulled him away from Eduardo. “Come on, it’s time to get in costume before Ruby comes looking for us.”
Eduardo cleared his throat and I glanced up to see that he was now dangling the mistletoe over mine and Zac’s heads.
“Oh for fucks sake,” Zac practically growled, his cheeks turning a little pink.
Before he could run away, I leaned in and gave him a brief kiss, earning us whistles and catcalls from the peanut gallery.
Zac blushed deeper, but offered me a weak smile. “Happy now?”
“Happy enough,” I replied. Lowering my voice a little, I added, “I may have to jingle your bells later, if you know what I mean.”
“You get so weird at Christmas, Tay,” he said, shaking his head in disapproval. The way he smirked said that he really felt otherwise about what I’d said, though.
I just laughed and tossed his santa hat to him. In minutes we were all dressed and ready to make ourselves look like idiots with way too much holiday spirit. We spent the better part of the afternoon and early evening running through a few different songs and routines before settling on one of Elvis’s Christmas tunes. After nailing down the routine, we took a quick break for dinner and then it was time to actually work.
It was a long evening, and by the time the club closed for the night, I should have been exhausted. Somehow, though, I wasn’t. I supposed it was just the Christmas spirit. The fact that one of our favorite radio stations had switched to all Christmas music programming for the holiday season didn’t help, and I found myself singing along to every song they played as I drove us home.
“I swear to God, Taylor,” Zac growled. “I’m going to deck your fucking halls if you don’t shut up.”
“Mmm, you promise? That sounds kinda kinky.”
Zac yelped and practically fell out of the car trying to get away from me. At least we were in the parking lot and not still in motion, but the way he was nearly sprinting toward the apartment made my heart sink. I was fine with taking things slowly, but there were times when he still freaked out on me a little and I had to wonder if this was really what he wanted.
I took my time walking into the apartment, hoping to give Zac time to calm down. I could hear him in the bathroom when I walked in, so I headed to the kitchen and poured myself a cup of cold coffee, which I stuck in the microwave to warm up. Even though I should have, I didn’t feel the least bit sleepy, especially not with Zac’s weirdness on my mind. Just as I settled into the couch with my coffee, he stumbled back into the room, having changed into a t-shirt and sweatpants, and flopped down on the couch next to me.
“So,” I said. “What do you want Santa to bring you for Christmas this year?”
Zac eyed me. “That depends. Is ‘Santa’ really you and is any ‘package’ he brings me really your penis?”
“Maybe…” I replied, trying–and failing–to keep a straight face.
He sighed and scooted a little closer to me. “Look, I know you are just obsessed with Christmas and everything, and I’m not trying to be a grinch. It’s not even about that. It’s just, you know, I don’t really know what I’m doing here. And you know it isn’t easy for me to admit that I’m nervous about something or that I think I might not be good at it.”
“Is that really what you’re worried about?” I asked, trying to sound sympathetic when I really just wanted to laugh.
Zac shrugged, and I could tell he was fighting the urge to pout. “Well, I mean, at least you’ve sort of been with a guy before, right? It’s just you, Tay. That’s it. You always joke about me being a prude, but right now, I guess you’d be right.”
“You’re not a prude,” I replied. “At least not because you’re nervous about this. It’s just your pride, and I get that. You don’t have to worry about making a good impression on me, Zac. You’re already kinda stuck with me.”
“Who said I was worried about impressing you?” He pouted, crossing his arms.
I pulled his arms apart and just barely resisted the urge to crawl into his lap. I settled, instead, for wrapping my arms around him in what I hoped was a comforting and reassuring manner. “After everything we’ve already done together, you really don’t need to worry about it. Even if you’re not; I’m just saying. I’ve seen you naked. I watched you shake your junk on stage. I’ve watched you have sex with a woman. Whatever we eventually do cannot possibly be any weirder than our lives up to this point.”
Zac laughed. “Maybe you’re right.”
“I am more often than you give me credit for,” I replied.
He rolled his eyes, but thankfully didn’t argue the point. Instead, he heaved a sigh, then leaned in and kissed me, pulling away far sooner than I would have liked. “Isn’t it your bedtime yet?”
“It’s not Christmas yet,” I replied. “We don’t have to get in bed early so Santa can come.”
“No, but somebody else might get to come if we go to bed…” Zac said, wiggling his eyebrows.
“Is that an invitation or a request?”
He shrugged. “Either or.”
“Well, come on, then,” I said, grabbing him by the arms and pulling him off the couch with me. “Let’s go make the yuletide gay.”
“You make everything gay, Taylor.”
“It’s a gift, really.” I smirked.
Zac rolled his eyes again, but let me lead him down the hall toward my bedroom, which we’d been sharing for the past few weeks. At least we’d made it that far in our physical relationship. He hopped into bed quickly and pulled up the covers; even with the light off, I could see his eyes on me as I slipped out of my clothes. He might have been taking things slowly, but moments like that reminded me that he did want me.
As I crawled into bed with him, I said, “I know what I’ll get you for Christmas.”
“What?” Zac breathed out, his hand finding its way to my waist in the dark.
“Some gay porn. You can consider it research.”