The first thing I was aware of before opening my eyes was a steady beeping. I could hear voices, too, although I couldn’t make out what any of them were saying. As I struggled to open my eyes, which seemed more difficult than it ought to be, the voices got louder and louder.

When I finally did open my eyes, I realized I was in a hospital, and those voices belonged to nurses and doctors who were crowded around me. Tears streamed from my eyes as they fiddled with buttons and wires and assured me not to panic as they pulled some awful tube from my throat.

Not panic? I didn’t even know why I was in the hospital. How could I not panic?

Once the doctors seemed to think I was doing well enough and left, a kind looking nurse told me there was someone there to see me. I wondered if it was Avery or Tobias; probably the latter, as I thought I’d heard a male voice just before I opened my eyes.

But it wasn’t. As the nurse walked out, in walked Zac Hanson, of all people.

“Zac? What are…” I trailed off, my throat sore and my voice so hoarse that it was barely more than a squeak.

“Don’t overdo it,” he said. “They told me you probably wouldn’t be up to talking, but I had to see you.”

I shook my head, hoping that would express my confusion at why he wanted to see me. I hadn’t seen him since I decided to leave the tour, and then… well, I didn’t remember. Everything after that was a blur. I thought I remembered taking a pregnancy test. Had something gone wrong? I looked down at my hospital gown covered body. I didn’t look pregnant.

While I was lost in my confusion, Zac had walked to my side and taken my hand in his. It hurt a little, having just had an IV removed from it.

Softly, Zac said, “God, I’ve been so worried, Colbs. I mean, it was my fault, you know? At least Layla wasn’t with us, but God, why would you even get into the truck with me when I was like that?”

I blinked. “In the truck with… what… who’s Layla?”

“Who’s Layla?!” Zac echoed, his eyes wide. “Oh god… you don’t remember, do you?”

I shook my head. I didn’t even know what I was supposed to be remembering.

Zac sank into the chair next to my bed, a chair that I realized had his leather jacket draped across it. So he had been to visit me before. Maybe a lot; there was a backpack against the wall with books and clothes scattered around it.

“Colbs,” he said softly. “I don’t… I don’t know where to begin. Layla is our baby. And we were fighting over how much time I spent with her, but you agreed to get out of the city with me for a weekend, and… well, it didn’t go all that well. And my stupid ass decided to have a few drinks when we stopped for lunch. And now you’re here. Like I said, Layla’s fine; Avery was watching her, she wasn’t with us at all. And you’ve been here… for three months.”

“The last thing I remember…” I shook my head. I wasn’t even sure what that thing was. “We were on tour. Then we weren’t. I don’t know. I think I was pregnant, but I don’t… I don’t remember her. I don’t remember… us.”

“Well, there never really was much of an us, was there?” Zac asked, smirking just a little bit. “Look, I don’t know how much it means while you don’t remember anything, but… well, I’ve been attending meetings. They have them here in the hospital, you know? And I was here, anyway, waiting for you to wake up. So for what it’s worth, I’m doing better now, and I just… I guess I just hoped there would be a better chance for something between us when you woke up. The… the divorce was finalized last month, too.”

It was all too much. I didn’t know what to think of any of it. He talked about us like there was an us, but to me… it was nothing. A tour affair that I had the good sense to end before it got too far. But when Zac took my hand in his again and looked at me with those big brown eyes, I wanted it to be more.