Together
Zac’s mind was racing at the thought of what he had Taylor had done. He snapped out of his daze when the bathroom door slammed, and he remembered the offer Taylor had made to him. How could he resist another opportunity to be so close to his brother? With that thought in mind, Zac scrambled to his unsteady feet.
The door was, of course, unlocked. Zac groaned as he pushed it open and saw Taylor bent over in search of a clean towel. A perverse urge to rush up behind him nearly overtook Zac, but he thought better of it. This thing between them was too new, too fragile, to risk any sudden move like that. Instead, he simply stood in the doorway and watched Taylor preparing for a shower like it was the most engrossing thing he had ever seen.
“Are you joining me?” Taylor asked, not even bothering to glance behind him as he put two towels on the rack and stepped into the shower.
“Yeah,” Zac breathed out.
He took a few quick steps into the room, closing the distance between himself and Taylor. Through the shower door, which Taylor had left open just a crack, he could see his brother bent over, adjusting the faucet. Taylor made a soft, satisfied sound as he flipped the shower head on, then spun around and gave Zac a big smile that made Zac weak in the knees. He had to wonder if Taylor really knew the full extent of the effect he had on him and whether or not he took advantage of that, but all the same, he didn’t dare tell him. Taylor wasn’t that manipulative, Zac decided.
“Come here,” Taylor said softly, holding out his arms.
Zac embraced Taylor, not caring about the water enveloping them as they kissed. He could drown in the shower’s spray and he wouldn’t even care, as long as Taylor was right there with him. His lungs, however, had other ideas. Zac coughed and sputtered as he finally pulled back to catch his breath, and he couldn’t help laughing a bit in spite of it.
“Let me,” Zac stuttered out. “Let me, let me do this for you. Please.”
Taylor nodded, as though he perfectly understood Zac’s stuttered words, and perhaps he did. Zac placed his hands firmly on Taylor’s shoulders and maneuvered him out of the shower’s spray, his back pressed against the tile. Zac latched onto Taylor’s neck, kissing and biting the tender flesh there. That was safe enough territory to start out with, he thought, but he knew he couldn’t stay there forever.
He slithered his hand between their bodies and was pleased to find that Taylor was already half hard, his dick pulsing ever so slightly as Zac wrapped his fingers around it and began to pump. As he did so, he lowered his head and trailed kisses down Taylor’s chest, taking first one then the other nipple into his mouth. Still, he didn’t allow himself to linger long. If he did, he might lose his nerve.
Zac fell to his knees with a soft thud and tried not to think of the bruises that would probably leave him with. All that mattered in that moment was right in front of his face, practically begging to be touched, tasted, anything. Zac found himself all too willing to comply, his mouth actually watering as he closed the distance between himself and Taylor’s dick. His mouth closed around it perfectly, even though his eyes had fallen shut, and Taylor’s moan reverberated through his body.
“Oh, god, Zac,” Taylor groaned, his hand coming to rest so gently in Zac’s hair that he almost didn’t feel it at all. “You know you don’t have anything to prove to me, but—god.”
Zac felt himself blushing at Taylor’s attempt at a compliment. He found a rhythm easily enough, one hand reaching up to cover the length his mouth couldn’t and the other digging into Taylor’s thigh to brace himself. There was an odd mixture of power and vulnerability in this, being connected to Taylor’s body in this way, and Zac found that it really turned him on. His free hand soon darted between his own legs, stroking his aching dick to the same rhythm that his mouth was moving.
It all seemed to take more coordination than Zac was sure he had, but at the same time, it just felt natural. It felt like second nature to him. All too soon, no doubt because both boys were still so over-stimulated, Zac felt Taylor beginning to buck against him and moan loudly. A familiar pressure was building up between his own legs, and he stroked himself faster. His orgasm came on fast and hard, yet somehow he didn’t lose his rhythm.
“Zac, I’m—” Taylor said, the words getting lost in a whimper. “If you don’t want to swallow, you should probably move. Soon.”
In truth, Zac didn’t know whether he wanted to swallow or not. What he did know was that he wanted to be as close to Taylor as humanly possible, and if that meant swallowing everything he had to offer, then that was simply what it meant. He braced himself against the shower wall and tried to relax as Taylor’s hips bucked against his face. A warm, salty stream filled his mouth as Taylor moaned loudly, and Zac struggled to swallow it all.
Eventually, he was forced to pull back a bit, sputtering. He felt his face heating up and didn’t dare look at Taylor.
“Hey,” Taylor breathed out. “That’s okay. You did… you did really good, Zac. That was so good, I promise.”
Taylor offered Zac a hand, and Zac took it, pulling himself shakily to his feet. Not knowing what else to do, he laughed nervously. The laughter proved infectious, Taylor joining in until the two were holding each other up in the throes of it. Zac didn’t even care that he still had his own come on his hands and Taylor’s dripping down his chin.
“Well,” Zac finally managed to say. “I think we definitely got dirtier—at least one of us, anyway.”
Taylor snickered. “Come here, let me clean you up.”
He pulled Zac under the shower’s spray, letting it do most of the work for him. Zac could do little more than stand dumbly while Taylor lathered him up with his shampoo, his mind reeling at the realization that he would smell like Taylor now. There was something horribly codependent about the way he felt toward his older brother, he was sure, and letting him bathe him was only further proof of it. Ultimately, though, Zac decided that he didn’t care. If being with Taylor like this was what he needed to feel normal again, for the first time in eight years, then it was what he needed and he wasn’t going to question it.
Once Taylor had washed Zac clean, all evidence of their indiscretions gone, Zac fumbled to return the favor. His hands, which somehow painted intricate scenes, seemed huge and bumbling against Taylor’s body, but he did the best he could. Taylor’s soft, contented moans gave him some confidence, even though all of this was still entirely new territory.
Soon enough, the two were as clean as they were going to get. They had done little more than step out of the shower and wrap towels around their waists when, from the kitchen, Taylor’s cell phone began to ring. He placed a quick kiss to Zac’s cheek before rushing off to answer it.
Trying not to think much of that, Zac walked into the bedroom and rummaged through his dresser for something resembling clean clothing. He settled on pajama pants and an old t-shirt, figuring that he didn’t have any intentions of leaving the apartment for the rest of the day. He supposed he was taking what Melissa called a mental health day, something she insisted that he needed, even if it was nearly the end of the semester.
His pajamas in place, he padded back to the kitchen, hoping Taylor was finished with his phone call.
“Yeah, no, that’s great,” Taylor said. “No, definitely. It’s short notice, but no, absolutely. Yeah, just email me the details. Great, thanks. Talk to you later.”
With only Taylor’s end of the conversation, Zac was perplexed, but it was clear that whatever the other person was saying made Taylor very happy. Zac felt himself growing irrationally jealous of that. Why couldn’t anyone else make Taylor happy? Shouldn’t he want that for him? Zac didn’t know what to think.
“What was that all about?” he asked, perhaps a bit too quickly, after Taylor ended the call.
“I’ve got a gig,” Taylor replied, grinning from ear to ear. “There’s a fashion show at the mall next week, a pretty big one, and their makeup artist just backed out. Since I work there already, my name got thrown into the hat. It’s nothing major, but you never know what sort of people will show up for these things. It’s something to put on my resume, at least.”
“That does sound good,” Zac managed to mumble around the lump in his throat. “Are you still, umm, looking for other jobs?”
“Why would I have stopped?” Taylor asked, looking perplexed. “I mean, I had only just started. I really didn’t expect to find anything so soon.”
Zac shook his head. “Nevermind. You can do whatever you want to do.”
He turned to leave, but Taylor grabbed his hand and pulled him back. “Zac, don’t do this. Don’t run from any serious conversation between us. This thing isn’t going to work if we don’t talk.”
“It isn’t going to work if you move away to California, either,” Zac muttered.
“Is that what you’re upset about? What you were trying to ask?” Taylor asked, barely waiting for Zac to nod before stepping in closer and continuing. “I can’t say what the future holds, what might happen in my career, but I know that I don’t want to go anywhere without you. But I’m not going to sugarcoat it. If the perfect opportunity popped up, but I had to leave here… I would do my best to convince you to come with me.”
“And I would just have to drop everything here and follow you?” Zac asked, hoping his tone didn’t give away that he knew he would, in a heartbeat.
“What’s everything?” Taylor asked, motioning to the apartment around them. “A crappy apartment paid for by Mommy and Daddy, classes you don’t ever seem to want to attend and no plans at all for the future? What have you actually got to lose here, aside from the adoration of our wonderful parents? Who, by the way, I’m sure you haven’t informed about your new roommate.”
“Why would I tell them?” Zac asked, ignoring Taylor’s other accusations. If he dwelt too long on those thoughts, he didn’t think he would like the conclusions they brought him to.
“You wouldn’t; that’s my point,” Taylor replied. He heaved a sigh and ran a hand through his hair. “Look, I’m sorry. I hate that this good thing for me has brought all of this back up and ruined what was shaping up to be a really good afternoon. I’m not… I’m not trying to push you into anything, but you need to think about what you want for your future. That’s all.”
“I want you,” Zac replied meekly.
“That’s not enough,” Taylor said. “You need to want some things for yourself, too. I know what we have is… it’s intense, I know. But it can’t be all there is to you. Figure out what you want out of life, and I’ll be hoping like hell that it’s something that will allow us to stay together. I don’t want to give up on this, Zac. Not when we’ve just started—started over, really. I have to believe there’s a way for us to build a future together. I just have to.”
Zac nodded, his mouth dry. “I just—I don’t know, Taylor. I’ve never had to make those decisions for myself.”
“I know you haven’t,” Taylor replied softly. “I know. But I’m not going to make them for you. I can’t do that to you. I need to know that you’re making your own choices. I couldn’t… I couldn’t live with myself if I thought you were just going along with what you thought I wanted.”
“I’ll think about it,” Zac said. “I really will. I… maybe after this semester, I could take some time off. No summer classes. Give myself more time to think.”
“I think that sounds like a great idea.” Taylor smiled. “It’ll give us more time together, too. Now, I’m going to go get out of this towel and into some actual clothes. Then, how about some lunch? Or an early dinner? I bought ingredients for a homemade pizza.”
“Yeah,” Zac choked out. “Yeah, that’ll be good. And I’m… I’m sorry I’m such a mess.”
Taylor shook his head. “No, Zac, no. This is all just new and confusing, I know. You think it’s any easier for me?”
“You make it seem easier,” Zac admitted.
“I’ve gotten good at acting, I guess,” Taylor said. “I had to be just to get through.”
“I’m sorry, Tay.” Zac lunged forward and wrapped his arms around Taylor, as though he could somehow protect him with that embrace. “I’m so sorry.”
Taylor pulled back slightly and looked Zac in the eyes. “No. No, none of that was your fault. And it’s all over now anyway. It’s over, and we’re going to make our way through things together now, okay?”
“Okay,” Zac replied, smiling. “Together. Okay.”
Zac wasn’t optimistic enough to believe that everything would be that easy, but for the moment, he was at least willing to pretend.