Oct. 16, 2013. Oread Hotel, Lawrence, KS.
Zac
I really am a glutton for punishment. I’d always kind of known that, but I hadn’t realized how literally true it was until recently. But now I knew I was definitely a masochist, and probably more than just physically; why else was I standing at Taylor’s door, about to ask him for things he probably wouldn’t want to give? Then again, he’d told me to talk to him after doing some reading. Anyway, disappointment is a type of pain… right?
I knocked on Tay’s door and waited, tapping out a rhythm on my hips. It only took him a minute to answer, but when he did he only opened the door a few inches.
“Yeah?”
“Hey,” I said, giving him a smile I hoped looked natural. “You busy?”
“Um… not technically…” The reluctance in his tone was clear; he must’ve been having his daily ‘me time’ he’d been demanding lately. Either that or talking to Scott…
“Oh… well it’s no big deal. I can leave you alone if you want…”
“No, it’s okay.” He held the door open for me, so I stepped inside. I heard the door close, but didn’t turn around, instead staring at a cheap-looking painting on the wall. Everything I’d planned on saying, all my carefully chosen words, sounded stupid in my head now. “You wanna sit down?”
“Okay…” I took a seat at the edge of the bed, then worried he’d read too much into it. There was a chair, after all. But he just sat next to me, a small but obvious space between us.
“What’s up?”
“I’ve been doing some… reading.” I watched for Tay’s reaction; at first he tilted his head like a confused puppy, but then his eyes went wide… and there it was.
“Oh… okay.”
“Looked up some stuff online.” I looked down and picked at a worn patch on my jeans; this wasn’t going how I’d planned at all, but then I guessed someone like me was supposed to be a little on the meek side. I glanced up, and saw Tay nodding slowly.
“Did you um… learn anything?” he asked, and I nodded. “Like what?”
“Well…” I took a breath and tried to untangle the jumble of words in my brain. This had been so much easier in front of the mirror. “Remember when you, um, bit me?”
“Y-yeah, I remember.” Tay chuckled, and it felt like he was teasing me.
“Well… I was thinking about that.”
“Okay…”
“And like… how we’re brothers…” I had a feeling Tay felt like he was pulling teeth, but I wasn’t trying to be difficult. “And how it’s kinda… kinda wrong.”
“I’m… I’m aware.” Taylor swallowed hard; whether he knew where I was going with this or not, it didn’t really matter. I’d get there eventually, even if it took a while.
“But… I kinda kept thinking about it anyway. So I got to thinking… that’s kinda… bad, right?”
“What do you mean? Bad that… that we did that?”
“No… well, kinda but I mean… Bad that I kept thinking about it.”
“Oh… um… yeah, I guess.”
“So that means… I’ve been kinda… bad.”
“So… you need to be… punished?” Taylor smirked at me, and I felt my cheeks burning. Way easier with a mirror. He cleared his throat, and I felt him scoot closer. “I… I think I can do that.”
“Yeah?”
“Y-yeah.”
“Okay.” I let out a breath; either Tay was more twisted than I thought, or I was better at getting what I want. Either way, I wasn’t about to question it too much. “Did you have any ideas about specifically how you ought to be punished? Or do you want me to decide?”
“Um… I guess you could.” Honestly, I hadn’t expected him to give in; so, I had no idea what to do next. “I mean, the sub’s not supposed to tell the dom what to do, right?” I added with a smirk. Tay sighed and rolled his eyes; I guess he didn’t find it as funny as I did.
“Well the problem is, right now, neither of us really know your limits.”
“I trust you, though.”
“I know you do, but… I just don’t wanna do something you won’t like.”
“Well how will I know what I like if I don’t try stuff?”
“You’re right,” he sighed after a minute, and I gave myself a mental pat on the back. “Okay. Um, well… spanking is a good punishment, I guess. Th-that could be a good way to start.”
“Okay,” I replied, nodding. I really did trust him; he was the one who knew about this stuff, not me. And even beyond that, he wouldn’t do anything to really hurt me.
“Okay, um…” He sighed deeply and ran a hand through his hair. “T-take your jeans off? Just the jeans.”
I nodded once, then stood up and took of the offending article, leaving me in my tee-shirt and boxers. He tried, and failed, not to stare, and I felt a weird mix of embarrassment and pride.
“O-okay… get on the bed, on your knees.”
I crawled onto the bed, hanging my head. I glanced back and saw him standing behind me. He ran a hand up and down my back; I thought I felt his hand shaking, but I was pretty sure I was shivering too.
“Okay, if you did what you were supposed to, you probably read about safe words, right? They’re really important. ‘Stop’ isn’t really a good one, but… I guess it’ll do for now. You say stop and I will. I promise.”
I nodded, not trusting my voice. I trusted Tay, but I understood why that was an important rule. Still, I doubted I’d be using it.
“Okay. I’m not gonna do… that much. Just to start out. You think you can handle… five?”
“Y-yes.”
“Count for me?”
“Okay.”
“Okay…” Tay ran his hand down my back again, lower this time, brushing against my ass. He lifted it up, and I braced myself for the impact… and then he barely let his hand fall against me. I glanced back, blinking at him. Did he think I was that fragile?
“T-tay?”
“…yeah?”
“You, um… you can go h-harder.”
“Okay,” he sighed, and I turned to face front again. “Don’t forget to keep count. Out loud, okay?”
“Okay.” I braced myself again, and he did go a little harder, enough to make me suck in a breath. “One. T-two,” I said, wincing at the next slap. It still barely stung, more like a mosquito bite than a spank.
“Was that too hard?” Tay asked, rubbing my back. I shook my head; I wanted to say something, but he was getting better so maybe… nope.
“Three. Tay?”
“Yeah?”
“Not to talk back, but um… isn’t it supposed to, like… hurt?” It was a snarky, smart-ass comment and I knew it, but I had to do something.
“Do you want… harder?” He didn’t sound nearly as annoyed as I’d hoped, but at least he was offering to ramp it up. I swallowed hard and nodded.
“Okay.” He pulled his hand back and finally gave me a good, solid slap.
“F-four,” I let out, gasping a bit.
“You okay?” He rubbed the spot, which was starting to get a little sore.
“Yeah. I’m fine.”
“Okay…” He pulled back and delivered the final blow; it still wasn’t as painful as I’d hoped, but at least it wasn’t like his first couple sissy slaps.
“Five.” I wasn’t really satisfied, even if the way he was rubbing my back felt pretty nice. “T-tay?”
“Yeah?”
“You, um… I can take more,” I said quietly. I didn’t want him to think I was too needy, but, well… who was I kidding?
“You sure?”
I turned back to look at Tay; I was really starting to get annoyed. It was cute how careful he wanted to be, but it wasn’t much of a punishment if I had to beg for more, and I didn’t feel like much of a sub ordering him to keep going.
“You said to say stop and you’ll stop, right?”
“Yeah…”
“Okay.” I turned around again, hoping he’d get the hint. After a second, I added, “Hey Tay?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you think you could like… talk?”
“I… like what about?”
“Well, some of the stuff I read… the dom would, like, talk about the sub. And,” I added, softer. “How bad they were.” I was pushing my luck. I knew that. But I had to try, especially given my going success rate.
“Z-zac, I…”
“If you don’t want to,” I sighed, then waited.
“No! I mean… I can try.” He gave me a tiny smile that I looked over my shoulder to return, then started rubbing my slightly sore ass, giving it a light smack. “S-so, you’ve been bad, hm?”
“Y-yes.”
“Thinking about… something you shouldn’t think about?” he pushed with another slap. I winced a bit; they were starting to add up, even if they weren’t all that hard on their own.
“Yes.”
“Tell me,” he said, lowering his voice. “What were you thinking about?”
“You,” I admitted quietly.
“W-what about me?”
“When… when you bit me.”
“Mhm, what about it?” He gave my ass another smack, harder this time.
“I… I liked it.”
“And you… thought about it? How much you liked it? Is that all you did… think?”
I trembled; his hand was coming down with more force now. Maybe getting him to talk was making it easier for him, too.
“Answer me,” he demanded with another slap that made me gasp and wince.
“N-no.”
“W-what did you do?”
“Jerked off,” I almost whispered. I’d read that being shamed could be a turn-on, but I’d been skeptical at first. I’d been wrong. Something about being forced to voice my twisted sins was making me even harder than the physical punishment.
“What was that?” Tay asked with another smack. “I couldn’t hear you.”
“I jerked off,” I gasped. I thought I heard Tay make a sound, but his hand coming down on my sore skin was more than a little distracting.
“Y-you… you’ve been very bad then, haven’t you?”
I could only nod, whimpering a bit from the physical and emotional torture. This was what I wanted; this was what I deserved. I was bad… sick, twisted, bad in every sense of the word.
“S-so dirty… thinking about your… brother like that…” Tay punctuated his accusations with even harder slaps, each one making me whimper. He was really getting into it, and that was only making it better for me. Or worse. I couldn’t really tell the difference. He leaned over me a bit, his voice low as he massaged the tender area.
“Is that… all you thought about?”
I swallowed hard; I didn’t want to admit to that. I’d known it would come around to that, or at least I should’ve, but I didn’t want to say it out loud.
“Answer. me.”
“No…” I whined. Something in me was close to breaking, and I felt a desperate need to hold it together.
“Tell me. Tell me how bad you’ve been.”
“I…” I shivered, licking my lips.
“Zac…” His hand on my ass and my name on his lips was too much, and I moaned softly, my resolve breaking.
“I… I thought about… k-kissing you…”
Taylor
I gasped at Zac’s words. I don’t know what I had expected him to say, but it wasn’t that. This thing between us was certainly twisted, but somehow, kissing seemed a different, more intimate, sort of wrong. I knew what I should do with this new information about Zac’s feelings–run, run as fast I could. Yet I stayed.
“And t-touching you…” He added.
I moaned in spite of myself as I brought my shaking hand down on his ass again. This was so, so wrong. If we weren’t both already damned to hell, the fact that I wasn’t discouraging him from fantasizing about me had sealed the deal. Sure, I was punishing him for it, but it was a punishment that we were both clearly getting off on, thus starting the cycle of damnation all over again.
Zac cried out at my smack, and it caused me a moment’s pause. He soon recovered, though, and continued recounting his sins. “And… and you, touching me…”
“Mhm…” I replied, hoping to cover my moan, but failing. I gave him another smack, almost perfunctory, because I was too far gone to really care that what he was saying was a level of depravity I couldn’t have even fathomed a few weeks ago, too far gone to even deny that I wanted to do the things he said.
“T-tay…” He stuttered out, pleading.
“Yeah?”
Zac tugged at the hem of his boxer briefs a bit, not even turning to look at me. Even without seeing those puppy dog eyes, I could sense his desperation as he said, “P-please…”
“What?” I asked, trying to at least feign some innocence. “What do you want?”
He lowered his head further and inched his boxers down ever so slightly. Just how far was this going to go? And how far did I want it to go?
“You want these off? You wanna be n-naked for me, Zac?” I asked, my voice low and trembling. I didn’t sound like the Dom I was trying to be at all.
Zac’s only response was to nod.
Inching backward to give him a little space, I mustered up as much authority as I could manage and said, “Take your boxers off.”
He hesitated, shaking all over, and I wondered for a moment if he was going to obey. Finally, he pushed them down and kicked them off into the floor. I couldn’t help but stare at him; of course I had seen my brother naked before, but I had never really looked. His ass was rounder than I had realized, and already sported several bright red handprints. While I wasn’t a sadist by any stretch of the imagination, I had to admit that I liked the way it looked and knowing that I had done it to him.
I scooted in closer to Zac and ran my hand over the red spots I’d left behind. His flesh was burning hot, whether from my slaps or… I knew I shouldn’t have been thinking about his body like I was, but it was too late. Now that he was almost fully exposed to me, I couldn’t deny that this was about so much more than just indulging his need for punishment. But he had taken that punishment so well, hadn’t he earned a little something good, too?
With that thought in mind, I slid my free hand–the one not tracing the marks left by my slaps–around his front until I found the erection I was really hoping was there. It was, and it was even harder than I had imagined. It must have hurt, I thought; he had definitely earned a little help with it, especially since he hadn’t even complained. I wrapped my hand loosely around his cock, testing the waters. What if it was only fantasy? What if he didn’t really want this?
His only response was to gasp. I waited for him to object or push me away, but he didn’t. He wanted this.
“So dirty, Zac…” I mumbled, still rubbing the red spot on his ass as I slowly began to stroke him.
He whimpered and nodded. Was he into humiliation, too? I supposed so. God, I was going to hell for this.
“Is that all you thought about?”
“N-no…”
“Mmm…” I moaned out, smacking his ass lightly, almost teasingly. “You really have been bad, huh?”
“Yes,” he hissed.
“How bad, Zac? Tell me.”
He whimpered again and rocked his hips, trying to match or even speed up my pace. I gave his ass a hard smack to let him know that I wasn’t fooling around. It had to be a mindfuck–giving him what he wanted and punishing him for it at the same time–but it seemed that was what he wanted… what he needed.
“Zac…” I said warningly, slowing my pace until I was barely jerking him off at all.
“I thought about…” He was breathless, the words nearly drowned out by a moan. “S-sucking you…”
I didn’t even try to hide my moan; I was so far past denying that I wanted everything he talked about and more. My hand tightened around Zac’s dick, stroking him a little faster. My other hand fell down on his ass again. I was shaking with such anticipation that I could barely speak. “Y-yeah? You want… m-my cock in your mouth, Zac?”
He gave a low moan, his voice sounding like nothing I had ever heard come from my brother before, and nodded.
I gave his ass another hard smack. “Say it.”
“I… I want…” He gasped out.
“Say. It.” One hand fell on his ass again while the other slowed down to a pace that I was sure was just this side of torture.
Zac cried out, and I feared I had gone too far. Had I broken him? What would it mean if I did? Finally, he struggled to say, “I want your c-cock… in my, my mouth…”
I gave his ass another smack, but this one was more of a reward than a punishment. “So f-fucking dirty, Zac… thinking about sucking your b-brother’s cock…”
“Yes,” he moaned softly.
I stroked him faster. “I bet you’d… let me c-come in your mouth, wouldn’t you?”
“Oh god…” He said, his voice so soft that I could barely hear him.
“Answer me.” Another hard smack.
“Yes.”
I trembled all over, but my grip on Zac’s dick remained steady. “Fuck…”
He rocked his hips again, and I only gave him a light slap in return.
“So eager…” I said, my own voice a pathetic whimper that did nothing to hide how turned on I was, too.
“Yes…” He whined.
Breathlessly, I said, “Tell me… h-how bad you want it…”
“B-bad…” He moaned, his hips rocking backward so that he was effectively grinding against me. It was subtle, and could have even been an accident, but I knew better.
I pulled back, just out of his range, and gave his ass a hard smack that made him cry out. “What do you want, Zac? Tell me.”
“It’s bad…” He said softly.
“I know,” I replied, punctuating the statement with another smack. “Tell me.”
“I c-can’t… it’s… it’s really bad,” he replied, his voice shaking so badly that I really did feel sorry for him.
But I had to remind myself that he wanted this. He wanted the punishment and he wanted my touch… and more. He wanted me to dominate him. While I wasn’t a Dom by any stretch of the imagination… I wanted that, too. I wanted to give my brother exactly what he wanted, and so I mustered up all my strength and spanked him again.
“I didn’t ask if you could tell me,” I said.
Zac cried out, then softly, he replied, “I want…”
He was so close. So, so close. I rubbed the spot I had just smacked, trying to coax a few more words out of him.
“Y-you,” he said, his entire body shivering and his voice barely above a whisper. “I w-want you.”
I moaned at his words and brought my hand back down over the same spot I’d already marked with my hand. Zac’s hips rocked back against me again, and this time, I didn’t move out of his path. Instead, I rolled my hips forward, letting Zac feel how hard I was, too. “This? You want this?”
He gasped. “Y-yes.”
“Tell me, Zac,” I said, my voice so low that even I barely recognized it.
“I… I can’t…” He whimpered.
I gave his ass a hard smack that echoed through the room. “How can I punish you if you don’t tell me how bad you’ve been, Zac?”
“I w-want you to… to… f-fuck me.”
Any sense of reason I had left in me was gone as soon as those words left his mouth. I jerked him off roughly, moaning his name as though he were the one touching me and not the other way around. My body trembled as I spoke. “S-so… so dirty. Never knew my baby brother liked it up the ass…”
He nodded, a shiver running through his body.
“How much of a little slut are you, hmm?” I asked, but only got a moan in response. I gave his ass a light smack. “Hmm? Has my baby brother had his ass fucked?”
“Umm… s-sort of.”
Another smack. “Either you have or you haven’t, Zac.”
He exhaled heavily. “I… I’ve used toys.”
“God… you are a little slut, aren’t you?” I asked, trying to hide my genuine shock under the veneer of dominance I had built up.
Zac whimpered, and I could have sworn that he sniffled a little. Had I gone too far?
“Zac?”
He shook his head quickly. “I’m f-fine.”
“Okay…” I replied, trembling. I rubbed his back soothingly. “Tell me… tell me what a little slut you are, Zac.”
“I’ve fingered myself…” He replied, “and… and used a toy…”
“W-what kind of toy?” I asked, dragging my fingernails down my back. When his only response was to arch his back, I dug my nails in. “Zac. Answer me.”
He gasped. “A d-dildo.”
“Mmm… was it big?” I asked, trembling as I tried to picture it–Zac fucking himself with a fake dick, something even I hadn’t done in spite of my own admitted kinkiness.
“S-seven inches,” he answered. “I couldn’t take it all.”
My eyes widened. That changed my mental picture a bit. I rubbed his back and remarked, “That’s… really big, Zac. I bet that hurt…”
He nodded, and my mind continued to churn out sick, twisted and incredibly hot images.
“Poor baby,” I said, still rubbing his back soothingly. “You just gotta practice, though. Then you can take it.”
Zac gasped. I was waiting for the safe word. Any minute now he would say it, surely. It was only fantasy, wasn’t it? Yet… if it was, he would have stopped me long ago. We were so far past the point of no return that I was only kidding myself by pretending that we could still stop.
“How many fingers did you use?” I asked, letting my hand creep down his back. I wasn’t going to touch him there, but I wanted him to think about it.
“Th-three…” He shivered.
That wasn’t the answer I had expected at all. He had seemed so innocent, but it was clearly just an act, hiding a deep perversion that I couldn’t have imagined. “Fuck… such a little slut, Zac.”
He whimpered and nodded, clearly ashamed of himself, but not denying what he had done.
I pulled back, and in spite of the way I was trembling, I tried to sound like I knew what I was doing. “You trust me, right, Zac?”
He didn’t even hesitate a second before nodding.
“O-okay…” I replied, the plan only forming in my head as I spoke. “Just umm… just stay right there, okay?”
“Okay.”
On shaky legs, I stood up and walked over to my suitcase. My hands trembled as I rummaged through it. Finally, I located a bottle of lube that I kept on hand just in case, and walked back over to the side of the bed. I stared down at my brother for a moment, barely even recognizing him. Sure, he looked the same, but everything else had changed. I said his name softly to get his attention; whatever he was thinking about, it occupied his mind so thoroughly that he hadn’t even noticed I was right next to him.
“Yes?” He asked, not looking up.
I slid the bottle of lube onto the bed in front of him. “Finger yourself.”
He didn’t respond, and I wondered once again if I had crossed a line that I couldn’t see.
A little softer, I said, “I know you can do that for me…”
After a moment of silence, he nodded and said, ‘O-okay…”
“I knew you could, you little slut,” I replied, giving his ass a little smack. The line between play and reality was blurred, but I had to try to maintain what was left of it.
Zac sat back on his heels and took the lube in his hand, slicking a few fingers with it. Though his face was mostly covered by his hair, I could see that it was bright red. Wanting to watch the show, and figuring he would relax more if I wasn’t staring him in the face, I walked to the foot of the bed and watched as Zac went back onto his hands and knees and reached one hand back between his legs. He hesitated for a moment.
“Zac,” I said sternly.
His back tensed as he began to slide a finger into his ass. As he inched it in, he moaned softly. I wondered how long it had been since he had touched himself, but I didn’t dare ask.
“That’s better…” I said.
Zac began to thrust his finger slowly, building up a rhythm. I let out a moan of my own. This was even hotter to watch than I could have imagined, and I couldn’t resist indulging myself. My hands trembled as I reached for my belt buckle, and it took a pathetically long time to free myself from my pants.
He paused when the sound of my zipper being lowered broke our silence, and I asked, “Did I say you could stop?”
“S-sorry,” he replied softly. His finger began to move again, and a moment later, he added a second one without even being prompted. It was too hot for me to remind him that he hadn’t been ordered to do that, though.
“G-good boy,” I said, wrapping my fist tightly around my cock.
Zac paused, and I wondered what he was thinking. I wanted to see his face, but I had to stay in my role.
“Mm, I bet your ass is really tight, huh?” I asked, trembling.
“Y-yes…”
I shook even harder as I stepped out of my jeans and climbed onto the bed, positioning myself behind Zac. “You b-better finger yourself good, then… get yourself loosened up…”
Zac thrust his fingers harder, and I wondered if he understood what I had planned.
“You wanna be able to take my cock, don’t you, Zac?” I asked, running my hand up and down his back, feeling the muscles in it tensing and relaxing as his hand moved.
He nodded, a loud moan falling from his lips.
“Say it,” I said, my voice low. I had to hear it in his own words, to know that I really was doing what he wanted. “Tell me what you want.”
“I want to take your cock,” he replied, and although his voice was shaking, I believed him.
I drug my fingernails down his back. He wanted it. He really wanted it. And God help me, I wanted it, too.
Zac whimpered. “Sh-should I add another, m–”
“Hmm?” I asked. “What was that?”
“N-nothing…”
I smacked his ass. “Don’t lie to me.”
“S-sorry,” he gasped out. “But you said not to… to call you…”
“Maybe I changed my mind.” Maybe I was getting far too into this role. Zac paused, and I smacked his ass again. “Don’t stop unless I tell you.”
“Y-yes…” He said, then softly added, “Master?”
“That’s better,” I replied, trembling. Forget not recognizing Zac, I didn’t even recognize myself anymore. “And yes, I think you should add another. You said you used three before, right?”
“Yes, M-master.”
“Then do it.”
Zac nodded, his hand slowing its motions as he struggled to add a third finger.
I rubbed his back gently. “Come on… you can take it.”
He took a deep breath, then pushed all three fingers inside. He let out a long, low moan as they slid in fully.
“There…” I moaned out. “I knew you could take it.”
He nodded, his back heaving as he panted. His fingers stayed stationary.
“Does it hurt, baby?” I asked, rubbing his back.
He tensed. “A little…”
“Just take your time… I know you can take it, Zac…”
He took a few deep breaths, then slowly began to thrust his fingers.
“Good boy,” I said.
“Th-thank you,” he replied, and I could almost hear the smile on his face.
I rubbed his back. “T-tell me when you’re ready, okay?”
He nodded, thrusting his fingers a little faster. He let out another low moan, and it was the best sound I had ever heard.
“Feels good, doesn’t it?” I asked.
“Yes…”
“F-fuck…” I moaned out, wrapping my hand around my dick and stroking it quickly. “I bet your ass feels so good, Zac..”
He thrust faster, rocking his hips back against his hand, and whimpered pathetically. Any doubt about his intentions that might have lingered was shattered completely.
“You want it bad, don’t you?” I asked, then smacked his ass. “Fucking slut.”
Zac gasped. “Y-yes…”
“Tell me,” I said, my entire body shaking as I jerked myself off.
“I want it…” He moaned.
“What do you want, Zac?”
He whimpered. “I want your c-cock in my ass.”
“Oh fuck… Zac…” I groaned. I could have come right then, just at his words, but it would have ruined everything.
“M-master…”
“Yes?” I asked.
“I’m ready.”