March 2008
Avery who had just finished doing the dishes from breakfast jumped some when she heard a knock on the door. Her eyebrow raising curiously because she wasn’t sure who would be coming by this Saturday. She was sure most of her siblings knew her parents were out of town today.
Leaving both her and Jessica in charge of Zoe and Mac as they went on some day trip with their church to help clean another smaller Orthodox church an hour or two away.
Avery was half certain Kate may have went to even with being heavily pregnant, just because the church was an escape for her as well as Zac at times. Which as an escape Kate used a lot of opportunities to be dutiful and help when she could.
The same as Avery’s parents though sometimes Avery swore her mom only helped just to be recognized and get attention instead of doing it out of the goodness of her own heart.
Hearing a second knock, Avery shook her head before wiping her hands in a hurry and running to get the door. Mainly because if she didn’t then no one else would. Jessica had left after breakfast to go and see Joe and Zoe and Mac had headed to their den in the basement to watch movies.
When she made it to the door, she threw it open in a hurry. Pausing when she came face to face with Taylor who was standing on the porch steps.
“Tay?” Avery questioned feeling confused as to why he had knocked instead of letting himself in. It was no secret that all the siblings who had left home had keys in case they wanted to let themselves in. “You didn’t have to knock,” she laughed as she moved aside so that her brother could come in.
Taylor stepped inside shrugging his shoulders, “I knew you guys were here by yourselves. Didn’t really want to scare you or anything,” he explained as if that made all the sense in the world and maybe to Taylor it did but Avery just found it kind of dumb.
Though she’d be nice and not tell Taylor what she thought. It would spare his feelings and diva attitude and it was easier that way.
“So did you come by to get something?” Avery asked as she shut the door, watching as Taylor just stood in place, looking down at the floor as if he was nervous or something.
Taylor shook his head at Avery’s question, “I actually came by to see you,” he stated and his words made her have a sinking feeling.
Like whatever he had came to see her for was bad because usually none of the older brothers came to see her. If one did it was Zac but that was only because she was closer to him. So Taylor being here had to be bad.
“See me?” Avery whispered as she felt her heartbeat began to quicken. “What did I do to make you come by to see me?”
“Can we talk in the living room?” Taylor asked and his question did nothing to settle Avery’s nerves. Instead she only nodded her head wordlessly, following behind as Taylor lead the way into the living room.
But once they were there Avery chose then to break her silence, “Well?” she asked as she sat down on the couch, looking up at Taylor who stayed standing and he still looked as nervous as he had earlier. “Why did you come to see me for?”
Taylor took several long breaths before reaching into the pocket of his jeans were he pulled out two folded pieces of paper. “Isaac found these pictures on a messageboard,” he explained as he handed the pictures over to Avery. “He…you know him he just wants to know if there is something you should tell us?”
“Messageboard?” Avery laughed softly as she unfolded the papers though the moment she did she tried to keep a neutral face as she saw what pictures Isaac had printed out.
It was two pictures taken exactly two weeks ago yesterday. One picture was right before Paisley had kissed her and the other was during the kiss. Though the pictures were grainy enough that it was questionable if it was her exactly but Avery knew it was her, she knew her own damn dress and of course she knew Paisley.
Just like she faintly had a memory of what she had thought was a camera flash before kissing Paisley and now she knew it had indeed been one. Some local fan had been in that bar and recognized her, taking her picture without her even knowing or realizing. Invading her privacy.
“You know the ones fans run,” Taylor answered and yeah Avery knew exactly the ones. She had spent all summer last year going down the rabbit hole with Mac.
Viewing what the fans said and being creeped out that fans had pictures of her that were taken with her friends. Pictures that Cordelia and Juniper had put up on their myspace and ones fans had no issues with taking because they were public and everyone had a right to public pictures.
“Yeah I know those,” Avery nodded with a sigh. “But these aren’t me,” she denied as she looked away from the pictures and up at Taylor. “Whoever took and posted these is lying. Why would these be me?”
“I mean girls your age do crazy things Avie,” Taylor smiled though it looked fake like everyone of the smiles he gave fans. “They kiss other girls while drunk and whoever posted these said they were taken in that bar downtown. Knew the name of it and mentioned being a regular.”
Shaking her head Avery felt tears welling up in her eyes but she did her best to blink a few times to keep them at bay. “Well I don’t. I’ve never kissed a girl while drunk and I’m not the person in these pictures. The fan is clearly mistaken,” she muttered out doing her best not to take her anger out on Taylor.
It wasn’t Taylor she was angry at. It was herself and the fan who if she was a regular at the club had to be lesbian or bisexual and she should have known better than to take pictures of Avery in a place like that. She should have used her brain and thought that what would happen if Avery wasn’t out and her family had seen these pictures like they had?
Taylor looked at her hesitantly and Avery felt like he didn’t quite believe her. “I believe you,” he told her those his words came out just as hesitant as he had looked. “If you say it’s not you then it isn’t you. I’ll have someone try to get these taken down though. I know how damaging rumors like those and pictures with people who look like you can be.”
Avery nodded her head knowing that of course Taylor knew what gay rumors were like. Out of all the boys in the band it was Taylor who had been plagued with gay rumors.
“Is that why Ike sent you instead of coming himself or sending Zac?” Avery asked as she watched Taylor as he turned to leave. Though her words made him stop in his tracks.
“Sort of,” Taylor answered sounding as if there was more but he didn’t want to say. “He just knew I had experience with stuff like this unlike him and I don’t really think he even mentioned these to Zac. Probably because lately whenever he tries to talk to Zac they get into an argument.”
Avery fell silent as Taylor continued talking and once he was done she just watched him leave. A part of her curious why Zac and Isaac were arguing lately as well as being curious what other experience Taylor could have with stuff like they had talked about today.
Because in Taylor’s case all he had were gay rumors. Not actual evidence which confirmed or denied that.
Sighing at that thought Avery looked back down at the pictures in her hand, the tears she had been fighting off before finally coming out. A resolve settling inside of her that once she had stopped crying she’d walk upstairs and look at the messageboards she hadn’t checked since this summer.
See what people were saying about the pictures of her kissing Paisley and hoping that somehow Taylor kept his word when it came to getting the pictures taken down. Feeling afraid that if he didn’t somehow they’d land on her parents lap and of course her mom and dad would know it was her.
They had seen her in that dress two weeks ago and they’d know and then they’d hate her. They’d hate her for being what she was which was someone who liked girls a lot more than she liked boys.
Later that night long after her parents had returned and after everyone else had went to their own rooms for the night, Avery sat on her bed laptop on her lap as she browsed the very same messageboard she had spent hours on last summer.
Her eyes reading what was said in the post with the pictures of her and Paisley. How most posters said they had called this years ago with her. That she had just given them that kind of vibe though there was a small minority who said that maybe the person was wrong and maybe the person in the picture wasn’t Avery.
But not one person had even called the original poster out for outing her. For being so cruel as to not even question that if Avery were a lesbian that maybe she wasn’t out to her family yet.
Shaking her head Avery kept reading, pausing when she saw that another poster had found out who she had been kissing. Even being brazen enough to post Paisley’s myspace link and against her better judgement Avery clicked on the link.
She knew Paisley had one but she hadn’t ever really went looking for it and when she clicked on it she wasn’t surprised to find it public, especially when it became clear she used the site for her photography more so than to connect with friends.
Smiling some as she browsed around on Paisley’s myspace, Avery clicked through her pictures, stopping when she came upon a picture that had been taken of her yesterday when she had met Paisley for lunch before she had to go to work.
They had been leaving the restaurant when Paisley had said that she wanted to get a picture of Avery in the sunlight. Making a comment that she looked beautiful in it and of course Avery had let her because she couldn’t say no to Paisley even if she was trying to put the brakes on her feelings for Paisley.
The caption on the picture though was the real reason she was smiling though if she were being honest with herself. Not the fact that there was a picture of her up on Paisley’s photography myspace but the caption she had used. My moon in the sunlight.
Something that made sense to Avery because for the past week she had been calling Avery her moon. Saying that Avery had depths about her that she didn’t know yet and that one day she did want to know but she was afraid that those depths were probably dark or something and so instead of being the sun she was the moon. She was Paisley’s moon and Avery guessed in ways maybe Paisley was her sun.
The bright side to whatever dark she may have had. The one thing that helped ease her every time she panicked and she almost wished Paisley were here to ease her now ever since knowing she had been outed.
But Paisley wasn’t here in Tulsa, she had left this morning and went with Cal and Juniper on a trip they were making to North Carolina to look for apartments.
Cal had gotten a transfer from Tulsa Community College to a college in North Carolina, somewhere where she planned to go next fall and Juniper had already decided to go with her. A decision that maybe Avery found a bit hasty but she wasn’t going to tell her friend that.
It was Juniper’s business what she did and if she wanted to move to North Carolina to be with her girlfriend then she had that right even if it probably was going to end badly. After all they hadn’t even really been dating a year and what happened if it failed after the move?
Juniper had no friends in North Carolina and she’d just be stuck until she could find a way back to Tulsa.
Coming out of her thoughts as she heard her phone which was on her nightstand vibrate, Avery quickly closed out of the sites she was on before reaching for her phone and hitting talk. Having set her phone to vibrate so if it rang while she was sleeping it wouldn’t wake her.
“Hello?” she spoke into the speaker.
“Avie,” Cordelia’s voice greeted her. “Just calling to make sure our plans for tomorrow night are still on?” she asked sounding a bit hopeful. “I mean unless of course something came up with your girlfriend,” she added on sounding bitter.
Avery rolled her eyes at that, still not sure why sometimes it seemed Paisley struck a chord with Cordelia. “Of course our plans are still on to go out and celebrate your birthday,” she nodded knowing it was plans they had made just days ago even after knowing Juniper would be gone.
By the time Juniper came back Avery would be in Texas and Cordelia had made it clear she hadn’t wanted to wait until after Avery came back from Texas to celebrate her eighteenth birthday so instead just the two of them would go out tomorrow and celebrate.
“And Paisley won’t mind?” Cordelia questioned again still sounding bitter.
“Pai is in North Carolina too so no she won’t,” Avery shook her head. “But I doubt she would anyway. We’re not dating we’re just friends with benefits.”
Cordelia snorted softly at that, “Sure seems like you’re more than that as often as you two are together ever since you came out,” she spoke and again she sound bitter which maybe this time it made Avery feel guilty because she knew they had been together a lot.
Paisley had even inserted herself into their friend group just like Cal had and maybe Cordelia felt left out, especially if whoever she wanted was still unavailable.
“I’m sorry,” Avery apologized her voice going soft.
“Don’t be,” Cordelia sighed her sigh almost sounding guilty. “Just see ya tomorrow Avie,” she muttered before hanging up.
Hanging up as well Avery was just about to lay her phone down when a text from Paisley came through, another smile appearing on her face as she read it.
Miss your face my moon :). Remind me why I came on this trip with the love birds?
Avery laughed as she sent her reply back.
Because you’re a nice friend to Cal, my sun. Goodnight though and text me tomorrow, yeah?
After sending that, Avery finally laid her phone down. Moving to quickly move her laptop off her bed and then lay down. Feeling tired and a bit drained after the events of today.