February 2008
Avery chewed on her lip softly as she looked at the time after helping her mom prepare dinner. It was going on seven-thirty and if she left now she could get to the record store in enough time to see Paisley.
Which was a thought that made her blush because she didn’t know why she was even entertaining the idea of seeing the girl again. She had just met her and spilled her guts and there was no was no way she should go and meet her just to fool around.
Avery wasn’t that kind of girl but then again she was also a virgin so she really wasn’t any kind of girl and she was trying to figure out if she was straight or gay or just gay for Cordelia or maybe she was bisexual though a part of her was leaning towards no.
Especially since she hadn’t really found any boys attractive ever and something had truly been missing when she kissed Jeremy.
But still she shouldn’t go and take a stranger’s offer of experimenting. If anything she should just tell Cordelia what was going on and experiment with her. Though Avery was afraid of doing that just yet because what if Cordelia didn’t like her like that.
Just because Cordelia was a lesbian it didn’t mean she loved every chick and Avery may not have been her type so she didn’t want to do that and then there was the side of what if Cordelia did like her and it turned out Avery wasn’t gay but just gay for her.
Then things would always be murky and there was just no way she could tell Cordelia yet so maybe there was an upside to meeting a stranger after all and maybe Avery was just clearly out of her mine. That had to be it.
She was out of her mind and she knew the minute she turned to look at her mom that she was one step closer to being insane.
“Hey, mom can I go back out now that I helped you with dinner?” she asked with a raised eyebrow. “I just I think I’m going to go visit Cordelia instead of calling her,” she lied and she felt guilty for the lie but it wasn’t like she could tell her mom the truth.
That she wanted to run off and fool around with a girl she had just met. Then again she also couldn’t tell her mom that she was afraid she was gay for her best friend. Because clearly her mom, a woman whom she admired probably wouldn’t accept her which was something that also scared Avery in the end once she had answers.
Diana gave Avery a curious look, “But what about dinner?” she asked as she raised an eyebrow. “Nikki and Isaac are here with Everett and you know they’ll just end up eating your portion even if I try to save you some. That’s how it always goes with you kids when someone misses a dinner.”
Except Zac, Avery wanted to say but she bit her tongue because clearly it wasn’t her place to correct her mom that sometimes Zac had a weird diet habit especially once he and Kate had started going to that Orthodox church. Though it was just a diet and Avery clearly didn’t see anything wrong with it if it wasn’t hurting Zac.
Which he had never seemed hurt yet. He always looked healthy and fine to her and if he didn’t then she’d probably say something because hadn’t she always told Zac the truth?
Though Avery was afraid even there things were beginning to change especially as she was slowly coming to realizations about herself.
“I’ll get something on the way in,” Avery finally answered her mom with a hopeful smile. “Probably some nasty greasy fast food place which doesn’t compare to your cooking,” she added on hoping that maybe if she buttered her mom up some it would be easier to get her to agree to let Avery leave and skip dinner here at home.
“Fine Avery Laurel,” Diana relented with a sigh. “Just don’t be out too late or your father and I will ground you no matter how close to eighteen you are.”
Avery laughed but nodded her head because she knew deep down her mom was telling the truth. They would ground her if she was out too late.
“I won’t be,” she said as she shook her head and left the kitchen in a hurry bidding a goodbye to her pregnant sister-in-law and her eldest brother on her way out.
Maybe next time she’d see them longer and maybe she should have felt guilty again this time for missing out on family time but well with her family sometimes there was a thing as too much family time sometimes.
Arriving at the record store finally, Avery parked her car in a parking space and got out. A smile appearing on her lips as she watched Paisley who was sitting on the sidewalk look up at her mischievously.
“You’re ten minutes late,” Paisley said as she stood up and put the phone she had been holding in the pocket of her pants.
“You’re still here,” Avery replied back with a shrug. “You could have left, you didn’t have to wait around. I mean what if I hadn’t shown up?”
Paisley laughed slightly as she ran a hand through her hair, “I guess I would have been a fool then huh?” she asked as she walked a bit closer to Avery and Avery wasn’t sure why but even that action made butterflies build in her stomach. “But I knew you were going to come preferably in more ways than one tonight,” she finished off and Avery blushed at the innuendoes and at how low and seductive Paisley’s voice got.
“H..how did you know I would come?” Avery asked her mouth feeling suddenly dry now.
“Something about the way you looked when I mentioned it,” Paisley answered and to Avery she sounded honest. “You just had this curious look about you and I knew. I just knew that you’d come and I was right.”
Now it was Avery who laughed, “Partly, I’ve only came in one way so far,” she teased as she gave Paisley a wink and even though she still had butterflies she was somehow able to still flirt. At least Avery thought she was flirting. It wasn’t like she had much experience with it.
Watching now as Paisley blushed, Avery almost felt accomplished, making the girl blush like that. Knowing her words could have that effect on someone.
“So are we taking your car or am I going to follow you somewhere or?” Avery questioned in Paisley’s silence wondering how the whole thing would go down in the end.
“We can take my car. I’ll bring you back to yours later,” Paisley nodded and again Avery felt those butterflies again.
Though this time it was because she was going to be getting in a car with a stranger, someone she had met today and what if this girl was a serial killer because women could be serial killers too.
“Isn’t that how all horror movies start?” Avery asked teasingly as she followed behind Paisley. “I may wind up on the front page of Tulsa World listed as a murder victim tomorrow.”
Paisley laughed loudly at that, a laugh that seemed to calm Avery’s nerves slightly in ways Avery also couldn’t quite explain.
“Oh yes, I’m going to drive you down some secluded road and butcher you with my trusty little old pocket knife I keep in the glove compartment,” she teased back as she unlocked the doors once they made it to her car. “Better think twice before getting in that passenger seat Avery,” she winked before opening the driver’s seat and getting in and Avery couldn’t help the blush on her cheeks at Paisley’s words and actions.
Shaking her head she took one deep breath before getting in the passenger side and closing the door behind her. Staying silent as Paisley started her car and drove off. Heading into downtown Tulsa.
“I actually live in an apartment complex close to TU,” Paisley spoke filling the silence that had settled in her car. “So you know you can scream really loud if I try to murder you and my upstairs neighbor Bob will probably come running. He’s hated me since I moved in last year and he caught me making out with some girl in the laundry room on site. Said I was on my way to hell if I didn’t repent of my wicked ways.”
Avery laughed at that as she shook her head, “Sadly I have some family who would think that if I’m gay,” she admitted as her mind conjured up pictures of her parents and of Zac even. The one sibling who she was the closest too would probably hate her and all in the name of God.
A deity who Avery wasn’t even sure what she believed about him anymore. Obviously at one point she had believed in God, maybe had even been interested in the Orthodox church and gone to a summer camp. But the rules and provisions had been too much. Too ritualistic and she just couldn’t do it.
“You think they would be right?” Paisley asked and her comment made Avery pause as she just looked out the window trying to think of how to answer the question.
“I think if God is real he’s not going to send someone to hell for who they love. I think he has bigger concerns than who someone loves on his plate,” Avery finally answered as she looked at Paisley with a small smile that she knew probably didn’t even reach her eyes. “So no I don’t think they’d be right.”
After answering that, things fell silent between her and Paisley again and they stayed that way until they arrived at Paisley’s apartment complex. Lakewood Garden Condominiums.
It was a place Avery knew well because Juniper lived here in a two bedroom apartment with her own parents and the moment that fact clicked with Avery, Avery began to feel her heartbeating a bit wildly in her chest.
The thought of Juniper seeing her here and with another girl and god she knew if that happened the next time she saw Juniper alone then she’d question her or worse yet she’d run to Cordelia and they’d both question her and Cordelia could possibly be mad at her since Avery was sorta of ignoring Cordelia today.
But she was also ignoring Jeremy though too, not that Jeremy had tried contacting her since Avery had bolted from the car after their kiss and he was probably just as scared as Avery to initiate contact now. Some boyfriend and girlfriend pair they were.
“You okay?” Paisley asked as she parked her car, turning to look at Avery and Avery wondered if her panic at maybe being caught by Juniper was written all over her face. If she was that much of an open book sometimes.
“I’m fine,” Avery lied with a forced smile and a head nod. “Just nervous I guess,” she shrugged as she unbuckled, waiting for Paisley to get out before doing so as well.
Seeing Paisley give her a skeptical look again Avery felt like an open book with her.
“I think you’re lying Hanson but I’m not going to question why,” Paisley spoke and Avery felt herself blush. “It’s not my place,” she said as she shook her head before turning and walking away and Avery silently followed behind.
Almost feeling a bit relieved that she hadn’t been questioned by Paisley on her lie. She knew she had been open earlier in the record store but now, now was a time when she wanted to keep it to herself that she was scared shitless because a friend of hers also lived her and could see her and question her.
Even if said friend was also a lesbian.
The silence though that had once again settled over Avery and Paisley was broken when they made it to Paisley’s apartment and went inside, Paisley turning on the light after they had stepped inside.
“Excuse the mess,” Paisley apologized as she worked to pick up some articles of clothing that had been discarded in her living room. “Besides working at the record store I’m also taking classes at TU and sometimes I don’t clean up like I should.”
Avery shook her head as she laughed softly, following Paisley until they reached her bedroom where once inside, Paisley went to a hamper and threw her clothes inside.
“I have four brothers,” Avery spoke as she looked around Paisley’s room, noticing all the framed pictures on the wall. A few had people in them but a lot were just random places. “I don’t really mind messes,” she said as she turned back to face Paisley. “You into art or?” she asked not sure if the photographs were professional or some that Paisley had taken herself.
“I’m into photography,” Paisley admitted as she walked to the edge of her bed and sat down. “It’s what I’m majoring in at TU actually.”
Avery nodded her head as she slowly walked to the edge of the bed and sat down beside Paisley, “I’m thinking of majoring in art when I go to college,” she revealed as she chewed on her lip knowing she didn’t know Paisley’s age yet nor did Paisley know hers and maybe that was a downside to everything too.
That they hadn’t gotten each other’s ages before this.
Paisley raised an eyebrow at Avery’s words, “Are you going to get me thrown in jail Hanson?” she asked referring to Avery by her last name and oddly Avery liked it, because no one had done that with her before. They had her brothers of course because of the band but not her.
She was usually just Ave or Avie and Zac she was sure would always call her Avie baby even if she hated it now days. Though maybe she’d allow it with him but of course she’d let him think she hated it. Least his head or ego grew too much.
“I’ll be eighteen in November so I guess I could,” Avery revealed as she shrugged her shoulders.
“I turn twenty-one in July,” Paisley spoke as she inched closer to Avery, an action that for the thousandth maybe millionth time had give Avery butterflies. “Guess I’ll take the risk of jail with you,” she smirked as she reached over to slowly move some hair off of Avery’s face. “I just..I really need you to promise me one thing before we start.”
“And what would that be Chambers?” Avery asked curiously now referring to Paisley by her last name like Paisley had done to her.
“Don’t fall in love with me,” Paisley answered as she locked eyes with Avery her face now just inches from Avery and Avery felt a shiver run down her spine at the closeness. “I don’t do love. Never have and probably never will.”
Avery softly shook her head though she didn’t break eye contact, “This is just a one time thing with a stranger I’ll never experiment with again. I won’t fall in love,” she reassured her with a tiny smile.
Though saying some of those words felt wrong because maybe she shouldn’t have used the word never. Never always came back to bite people in the ass.
Paisley just laughed softly at that, like she knew something Avery didn’t know. Though she never stated what it was. Instead she didn’t say anything at all. Obviously feeling comfortable enough in Avery’s words because after laughing she leaned in to kiss Avery.
It was a slow kiss and different than the one Jeremy had given her. Paisley’s lips were softer against Avery’s than what Jeremy’s had been and this time when Avery let her eyes shut she didn’t think of Cordelia.
All she thought about was how nice Paisley’s lips felt against her own lips and the fact that the butterflies she had been getting off and on had seemingly taken flight in her stomach. Causing it somersault it a few times during the kiss.
Especially when Paisley’s kisses became a bit harder though Avery wasn’t complaining. Instead she was somehow able to keep up with the pace of the kisses and she had even let out a tiny moan when Paisley nipped at her bottom lip softly.
“You liked that huh?” Paisley asked as she pulled away from the kiss, looking at Avery curiously. “Having you lip bitten.”
Avery nodded her head as a blush coated her cheeks, “It was kind of hot,” she admitted with a slight smile before leaning in again and this time it was her who initiated the kiss between them.
Something which surprised her but then again she was surprised at how comfortable she was with this entire situation of kissing another girl. Kissing a girl she hadn’t even known that long but especially the girl part.
It just felt natural to kiss a girl and it felt nice and both of those things while not making Avery uncomfortable did make her a bit scared because she was pretty sure she knew what that meant for her sexuality on some level and right now she wasn’t ready to face it. Wasn’t ready to say what her brain already knew just from the kissing.
Feeling Paisley’s hand slowly find its way up and under her shirt, Avery felt a shiver at the other woman’s hands touching her skin so softly. Like she’d break at the touch and yet even though the touches were soft they were enough to make Avery’s body feel as if it was on fire everywhere that Paisley touched her.
Though it was a good kind of fire. A fire she craved and wanted more, which was probably why she decided to be bold and let her own hand wander up and under Paisley’s shirt and Avery couldn’t help smirking into the kiss when she heard an audible moan leave Paisley’s lips.
It was a moment she felt proud of. That she had made someone…another girl feel good.
Avery soon moaned herself not long after Paisley’s. This time it was a result of Paisley’s hand going higher under her shirt. High enough that she could feel her fingertips at the edge of her bra, which resulted in goosebumps forming on Avery’s skin.
Wanting Paisley to touch her a little higher. Run her fingers softly against the fabric of her bra and touch her breast the best she could through her clothing.
Pulling away from the kiss this time Avery slowly reached down towards the hem of her shirt, pulling it off and throwing it to the floor. Blushing once again as she was now clad in her bra and her jeans. Something that while it had happened a lot around Juniper and Cordelia at sleepovers had never been sexual but it was here with Paisley and now she was nervous.
Afraid that Paisley may not like what she saw or that she’d change her mind about this whole experience. But Avery soon found her fears were wrong as she watched Paisley take off her own shirt and throw it to the floor as well before leaning in to kiss her again and this kiss was more fevered and rushed.
Like Paisley was searching or wanting something from Avery. It was also a kiss in which Paisley’s tongue slowly came out and brushed across Avery’s lips and Avery found her mouth opening eagerly in response, granting Paisley’s permission in.
A soft moan coming out after as their tongues slowly brushed against each other at the same time that Paisley’s hand finally went to Avery’s bra and touching the places that Avery had wanted and maybe it was out of curiousness that Avery let her hand do the same.
Let her hand go to Paisley’s bra, her thumb slowly brushing over the top part of the exposed skin which again made Paisley moan and so Avery did it again and again her actions had the same result though they also caused Paisley to grip onto her breast a bit harder which was something Avery found she liked.
Getting a thrill of the roughness of it, just like she had liked it when her lip had been bitten.
Avery let out a slight whimper though when Paisley’s lips moved from her own, though the whimper died in her throat when Paisley’s lips attached to her neck.
Sucking and kissing on the skin lightly and Avery was almost afraid that she’d wind up with a mark on her. A mark she wouldn’t know how to explain to anyone especially the boy she was dating but Avery didn’t voice her objections to what Paisley was doing to her.
Her brain it seemed having been automatically shut down of any objections the moment their lips had touched in that very first kiss.
“Fuck,” Avery cursed out when she felt Paisley run a tongue across the skin of her neck slowly, goosebumps once again forming on her skin. “Just fuck,” she sighed knowing that she was liking everything that was happening and again she knew the reasons why but was scared to admit them.
Scared to even say them to herself right now.
Feeling a shiver run through her body as Paisley’s mouth worked it’s way down from her neck and even lower Avery felt her breath hitch when Paisley reached her bra covered breast, moving away only slightly to unclasp her bra and the moment it fell off Avery blushed.
This was her first official time being really half naked in front of another female for an entirely non platonic reason and once again she was feeling slightly insecure. Knowing she probably didn’t compare to whatever other chicks Paisley had hooked up with.
Not to mention she’d probably suck at the other stuff they did too because she was new at this and didn’t know a damn thing that she was doing.
It wasn’t like she had even had sex with a boy yet either. She was as inexperienced as they came.
“You’re beautiful,” Paisley spoke her words bringing Avery out of her thoughts. “I hope you’re boyfriend has told you that before because if not he’s a damn sucky boyfriend.”
“We’ve never really done anything together,” Avery revealed as she blushed even more. “I’ve never with anyone before,” she whispered feeling ashamed at just how inexperienced she truly was.
Paisley only smirked at that, “A true virgin then, not just a lesbian one. I’m really going to have fun corrupting you,” she spoke before leaning in to kiss Avery again and this time it still wasn’t slow. It was more hurried and her lips didn’t stay on Avery’s long.
Instead they followed the same path down her neck and onto her chest and Avery let out a loud moan when she felt the warm heat of Paisley’s mouth around her nipple. Sucking slowly while occasionally letting her tongue come out to brush across it.
They were actions that were making Avery tingly all over including down into her pussy which she knew was getting wet. She was getting turned on from this.
Paisley was turning her on in ways she never had been before and everything just felt so new and exciting and a part of her wondered why she hadn’t let this happen before with Cordelia.
But then again she had been in denial so that was one reason, but still.
Letting her head fall back as Paisley’s mouth soon went to her other breast, giving it the same treatment as the first all Avery was capable of doing now was moaning. Moaning and biting her lip to keep from moaning though she failed every damn time.
Though her moans soon turned into whimpers as Paisley moved her mouth away from Avery’s breast, coming back to Avery’s lips as they kissed again. A kiss in which Avery was pushed back on the bed with Paisley moving over her slowly.
Though it was also a kiss in which Avery grew bold and once Paisley was leaning over her, Avery let her hands slowly go around Paisley’s back where she quickly unclasped Paisley’s bra which soon fell off as well, leaving Paisley just as half naked as Avery was right now.
Which Avery thought was fair game. She had been starting to feel way underdressed and for now they were even.
At least until she had felt Paisley’s hands slowly going down her stomach, followed by her lips which once again kissed a trail down Avery’s neck but instead of going to her breast Paisley continued downward and Avery lifted her head to watch.
Her breath once again hitching when Paisley reached the waistband of her jeans, where she pulled away and looked up at Avery. Which Avery knew why.
She was asking a silent permission, a question of if Avery was sure and wanted to continue and Avery only nodded her head. Not sure if she trusted her voice right now to work properly because while she did want to continue she was so fucking nervous.
Nervous because the more this progressed the more Avery realized that thing about herself. The one she was avoiding saying to herself out of fear.
After she nodded her head, Avery watched as Paisley undid her jeans slowly and Avery lifted up some to help her push them off along with her panties and once she was fully nude Avery was half sure her face probably resembled a tomato or close to it.
She felt hot all over and she knew it was nervous. She was completely naked and bare in front of a stranger and one who was going to get her off sexually.
Had already turned her on and gotten her wet. Had made her realize things that scared her.
“You’re beautiful,” Paisley said again as she locked eyes with Avery from where she was between her legs. “So beautiful,” she muttered out softly as her hand slowly went between Avery’s legs, causing Avery to moan when it touched her wet flesh.
“Y..you’re just saying that because of the situation we’re in right now,” Avery replied as she shook her head. “You between my legs and your hand on my pussy.”
Paisley laughed softly at that as one of her fingers began to slowly brush across Avery’s bare wet skin, again causing her to moan. “I’m not just saying it,” she spoke and she did sound sincere. “You’re beautiful even when you had clothes on too but you’re fucking marvelous naked,” she winked before leaning in and leaving a kiss on Avery’s thigh.
It was tiny and chaste but it was enough to make every fiber of nerve’s Avery had go on edge as well as creating a want and a need for those lips to go just a fraction higher. Kiss the place where Paisley’s hand was.
But Avery found that she was too scared to ask, to scared to voice those words out loud.
Though Paisley it seemed had read her mind because before Avery could comprehend what was happening Paisley’s lips were on her wet flesh. Kissing and licking while one of her fingers slowly worked it’s way inside of Avery.
A place where Avery up until now had only ever touched while thinking of nameless, faceless people. Just a random person who would work to get the job done and get her off. A person who hadn’t really had a gender but after today Avery knew they would.
They’d have a gender and it wouldn’t be the one it was for most girls. The next time she masturbated she’d be thinking of a female.
Feeling her head fall farther back into the bed as Paisley added a second finger inside of her, her mouth and tongue both still working on Avery, Avery felt her hips began to lift up some to match the movements of Paisley’s fingers inside of her.
Fingers that were skilled in what they were doing and Avery tried not to think about how many people Paisley had done this too in the past but it was hard not. Not to compare and know that she was probably one of the lesser experienced ones. One who really didn’t have a clue what they were doing.
Though what Avery did know was that her orgasm was approaching. She could tell all of the tell tale signs from when she got herself off.
The way her breathing got a bit uneven and her eyes kept wanting to shut on their own and as she gave in to those feelings of her release, Avery reached down and let her hand curl into Paisley’s short locks. Paisley’s name leaving her mouth softly as he body went all pliant as she reached her end.
An end that had been brought on by another girl who had skilled fingers and an equally skilled tongue and mouth. A girl who was practically a stranger and yet who in some ways she felt comfortable with while also still being a bit uncomfortable too for the things Paisley made her realize.
Watching as Paisley moved away from between her legs, Avery blushed again when Paisley looked down at her with a smirk.
“Congratulations on your first orgasm brought on by someone else,” she spoke before leaning down to kiss Avery and this time as they kissed, Avery could faintly taste herself on the other girl. Which wasn’t something she objected too.
“Do you want me too…I mean I can return the favor,” Avery said as she pulled away from the kiss having realized that Paisley hadn’t gotten off yet and shouldn’t it be only fair that she get off too?
Paisley shook her head as she looked at Avery, “I…not this time,” she said almost like she was expecting something to happen between them again, though Avery knew it wouldn’t.
It was a one time thing, she had said as much when she propositioned her in the record store.
“Anyway I did this for you so consider it my gift that doesn’t need to be repaid,” Paisley whispered as she moved to fix some of Avery’s hair out of her face. “Hopefully a gift that helped you realize what it was you needed to realize.”
Avery nodded her head at that because it had helped her. “It did help,” she revealed with a bit of a wistful smile. “I..I may be gay for more than just my best friend,” she said though Avery wasn’t sure if she was ready to label herself full on gay just yet.
She had hopes that maybe she could experiment with Jeremy some even if there had been no passion or spark in their kiss like their had been in everything she had done with Paisley. Maybe she could at least try and see if anything else excited her or if him being sexual with her could turn her on because even with no spark or passion she was sure if he touched her in the right places he could at least do that…if she was into men too.
“So you’re a lesbian then?” Paisley asked as she moved away from Avery beginning to get redressed and Avery sat up following suit.
Though she fell silent as she put her clothes back on because she wasn’t sure how to answer it.
She didn’t want to say she was a lesbian yet, didn’t want to be still.
“I think I could be bisexual,” Avery finally answered but her tone sounded less sure and like she was second guessing herself.
Paisley only shook her head at that, “You’re really just going to need someone to pull you out of the closet forcibly aren’t you?” she asked with a teasing tone. “Make you realize yourself that you’re fully gay and not just bisexual.”
Blushing at her words Avery finished dressing as she stood from the bed, “But I could be,” she finally spoke as she defended herself.
“But you aren’t,” Paisley shot back sounding and looking sure of her words. A lot more sure than Avery sounded or felt. “You aren’t bisexual. Trust me on that,” she nodded before turning to leave the room and Avery bit her lip, deciding to just be silent now because what else could she say?
Obviously Paisley had made up her mind about Avery’s sexuality while Avery herself still wasn’t ready to give in because she knew being bisexual would at least be better than being gay. If she liked men as much as she liked females then she was partly straight and maybe her family wouldn’t totally hate her.
Arriving back home much later that night, Avery who had her bag of take out in one hand in her cell phone in the other, walked to the kitchen table and sat down.
Though the moment she was seated she heard her phone buzz as it vibrated against her skin and as she sat the bag of food down she hit to see who was trying to reach her. Feeling a bit surprised when she saw Juniper’s name because she figured it would be Cordelia or Jeremy since she had been avoiding both today.
Clicking so that she could see the text, Avery swore her heart nearly stopped at the words.
Swallowing hard Avery was sure she would drop her phone, not just because Juniper had seen her but also because Juniper knew who Paisley was. But then again they were both lesbians who lived in the same apartment complex and didn’t gays always tend to find each other like magnets.
Then again Avery was best friends with two lesbians and so maybe Paisley was right to say she wasn’t bisexual.
Shaking her head though Avery typed a response back to Juniper.
It was just another lie Avery was adding to her list lately. Which she wondered how many lies you could tell before they caught up with you?